“Polish her pearl? Nibble the bean? Perform the Australian kiss? Dine in at the Y? I don’t know if I can be any clearer here,” he teases, pretending to be irritated by my ignorance.
“Yes.” I nod. “Yes to all of that. I figure giving her a toy she can use on her own is less sexual than enjoying the watermelon sugar.”
Griffin points at me and winks. “That’a boy. I forgot that one. Honestly, I think you’re crazy as fuck for even going along with this whole plan when you could have just asked her out but more power to you my friend. I have no doubt you’ll have her knocked up in no time. Now come on.” He taps a few pucks in my direction. “Let’s see you hit a few more.”
I spend the next twenty minutes hitting pucks across the ice and being a goalie for Griffin while he tries a few maneuvers, and then I hear my cell phone chime in my pocket.
“Whoa. Hold up!” I gesture with a raise of my hand as I dig into my pocket. I pull out my phone and see the message I’ve been anxiously anticipating.
Marlee
It’s time!
“Is it her?” Griffin shouts from center ice.
I nod in response. “Yeah. I’ve got to go.”
I reply to her text that I’m on my way and then bend down to help pick up the pucks but Griffin pushes me out of the way. “Get out of here dumbass. I’ll get the pucks.”
“But—”
“Ledger, your girl needs you and that egg waits for no man. Hurry the fuck up and get out of here. You’ve got a job to do.”
“Right.” I nod.
If only I could drive in ice skates.
“Plus, Marlee will be pissed at me if I’m the reason you don’t get there. This is one time I will absolutely not be a cock block.”
“Thanks man. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Sure thing.” He waves me off as I rush off the ice. “And good luck!”
I’m out the door in less than ten minutes and pulling up in front of Marlee’s condo roughly twenty-five minutes after her text. She doesn’t live far from my apartment complex, which is a benefit. It’s a beautiful set of six condos nestled into a community of matching buildings. It’s nice to know she’s not alone here and that I could get to her easily from my place if need be.
“Okay, you can do this, Ledger. You can do this.”
I take a deep breath with both hands on the wheel and blow it out as I give myself a little pep talk before walking up to her door. “Shoot and score, man. Puck in the net. Jizz in the cup. It’s time to work some magic.”
I swallow my nerves because there is zero part of this that feels natural and walk up to Marlee’s front door. I reach up to ring the doorbell, but she opens the door before I even get the chance.
“Saw you coming,” she says on a laugh.
Is she going to see me coming though?
Should I ask her that?
“Hey Marlee, are you planning to watch me rocket your future child out of my cock?”
Yeah, definitely not asking her that.
“Hi.” I give her a soft smile and push my hands into my pockets so I don’t fidget. I’m not exactly sure what the etiquette is when you’re showing up at someone’s door for the sole purpose of masturbating into a cup for them.
Marlee gestures inside. “Please, come in.”
“Thanks.”
She closes the door and then leads me into her condo. It’s a nice-looking place as I glance around the warm hued living room. Summer flowers decorate her mantle and there are a few pictures on the opposite wall. Marlee spins around as we enter the kitchen. “Can I get you a drink?” She chuckles nervously. “Something to take the edge off?”