Page 64 of What if It's Us

“Yeah. I’ll be fine.” She breathes. “I mean it’s just going on one o’clock in the morning and here I am naked from thewaist down so some super-hot and ridiculously kind hockey player can shoot his little semen demons into my hell hole.” She laughs nervously. “I mean what’s not to be okay about that? Just because I haven’t been able to figure out how to make this happen for myself the way the rest of the world does it? It’s fine though.” She nods and I know she’s trying to convince herself everything is fine far more than she’s trying to convince me.

Also did she just call me a super-hot hockey player?

“Everything’s fine. Let’s do this. My body is ready.” She blows out a heavy breath. “I was made for this. Let’s feed the super uterus, shall we?”

Well, that’s one way of putting it.

Marlee yanks the blankets down that were covering her legs and pulls her legs free just as I’m positioning myself in front of her, but in doing so, her right knee knocks the plastic cup out of my hand.

“Oh…shit!” I lunge for the small plastic cup but try as I might, my hands are no match for a container full of jizz. With the kind of inevitability only reserved for romantic comedies and the average person’s worst possible day, we watch in horror as the cup flies from my grasp and bounces off the tip of my finger as I try to catch it and then rolls to the floor, spilling the contents all over the place.

Honestly, it looked like a slow-moving comet with a tail, but can I even pretend to make a joke at a time like this?

No. No I can’t.

“Ledger!” Marlee’s voice is a strangled cry, half horror, half wild. “Shit, shit, shit!” She’s still sprawled on the bed, but now her eyes are wide, her chin quivering, and she’s trying so hard not to cry.

Fuck.

Shit.

Dammit.

Hell.

Oh God…

Fuck.

She’s going to panic in three…two…one…

CHAPTER TWELVE

MARLEE

“Save the jizz, Ledger!” I shout in a full-blown panic, looking around to see where the small plastic cup landed. “You have to save it! Save it!”

“I…” He lunges for the cup, picking it up off the ground. His hand is a mess as the sticky goo drips from his fingers. “I can’t.” His sorrowful gaze falls to me as he shows me an nearly empty container. “It’s empty Mar. I’m so sorry. It landed upside down.”

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Shit!

How could this have happened?

Did I…?

What did I…?

How could I have…?

God, this is all my fault.

Falling back on Ledger’s pillow, I squeeze my eyes closed and cover them with my forearm wishing I could be anywhere but right here right now. A wave of heat falls over my body, causing me to sweat, and there’s a tightness in my chest I can’t recognize.It suddenly feels like something is choking me and I struggle to catch my breath.

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