Page 88 of What if It's Us

Fucking Griffin.

“I’m never trusting your husband again.”

“Hey, don’t knock my hot-ass husband.” She cackles. “Ledger was literally standing in our living room when his phone went off. If you could’ve seen how sweet he was about reading your text.” She brings a hand to her chest. “That man has had it bad for you for a long time.”

“I just wanted some brie.”

“Plus,” Layken continues, “Corrigan’s at work so I texted her and told her everything and she said if you’re pregnant it would possibly show up on a test a couple days early sooo…”

Blakely places the brown paper bag on my desk and starts unpacking it. “We brought three kinds of tests. Basic, digital, and the fancy one that practically live-tweets your results. Alsoginger ale, saltines, and dark chocolate in case you sob no matter what it says.”

“I don’t know if I should be impressed with how prepared you are or completely freaked out.”

“You love how prepared we are,” Ella confirms, patting my shoulder.

“I don’t…” I shake my head, my shoulders dropping. “I don’t necessarily feel pregnant. I just feel… off. Tired. Moody. Weirdly emotional. Like I cried when I pulled into my parking spot because I was inconveniencing this little bird that was eating some crumbs off the ground. I think my car covered them up and now…now…” Tears start to well in my eyes. “Well, what if he doesn’t eat the rest of the day because of me?”

“That’s adorable,” Layken says, eyeing me. “And suspicious.”

“You guys,” I groan. “What if I’m not pregnant and I’m just… losing it?”

Blakely leans closer, her voice surprisingly gentle as she covers my hand with hers. “Then we remind you that you’re human. And also, you’re not allowed to self-diagnose based on Google and a vague sense of doom.”

“Okay. Fine. I’ll do it.”

The ladies clap their hands with giddy, excited smiles on their faces.

“But fair warning: if I pee on my hands, I’m going to be pissy for the rest of the day.”

“Noted.” Ella claps her hands and then pulls the sparkly golden wand she uses when she’s Lumin, the team mascot, from her back pocket. She waves it in front of my belly and chants, “Double or triple the giggles and cries, give this belly lots of babies, tiny and wise!”

“You bite your tongue, woman!” I chastise. “I asked for one baby. That’s it. I am one mom and can handle one baby. Don’t curse me like that.”

Ella laughs and puts her arm around my shoulders as we walk out of her office and down the hall to the bathroom. “Yeah, but you have Ledger now so…” She holds up two fingers. “That leaves room for at least one more.”

Ten minutes later we’re all standing inside the bathroom on the top floor of the arena. I chose the top floor because I didn’t want to chance anyone seeing us or asking us what’s going on.

My fingers shake against my leg as I stand along the wall. “Why does three minutes feel likeyears?”

Scarlett looks at her watch. “You still have thirty seconds.”

Layken hands me a chocolate bar. “Emergency serotonin. Just in case.”

“Thanks.” I take the candy bar, unwrap it with an unsteady hand…and stare at the sink where all three peed-on sticks are resting.

Then the timer dings.

We freeze.

My heart pounds inside my chest because even though I know it very likely won’t say anything positive, part of me does feel like things aren’t the same as last month. I feel differently than I did then. I can’t deny that to myself.

Pushing away from the wall, I take a deep breath. “Okay. It’s time.”

Ella grabs my wrist as I step toward the sink. “Wait. Do you want one of us to check it for you?”

“No. If it’s positive, I want to see it first. And if it’s negative…” I shrug. “Then I’ll pretend I’m fine and cry into my pillow when I get home.”

Blakely nods her understanding. “We’re here for you girl. No matter what.”

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