Page 15 of Bitter Falls

The rain covers the shower sound pretty well; I can barely hear it myself, and it’s even farther away from Mom and Sam. Vee’s quiet, at least.

I wait tensely, chewing my fingernails, until she comes back. She’s showered and changed, and she sinks down on my bed with a sigh. Her dark hair is wet and dripping on the T-shirt, turning spots transparent. She looks better. And a little less high.

I lean close and say, “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Well,” she says, and her rural accent drags the word out. “The courts said they’d put me with my aunt, but she couldn’t take me after all, so then they put me in a foster home, and I ain’t taking that shit. Would you, Lanta?”

Vee is the only one who calls me Lanta, short for Atlanta; everybody else just says Lanny. I kind of like her version. And I’m also afraid of liking it. “Probably not,” I reply. “Were the foster people mean or something?”

She shrugs. “They told me when to go to bed, when to get up, what to wear, what to eat. Didn’t care for that shit.”

“And you came here? Have youmetmy mom?”

“Your momma’s a badass bitch,” Vee says. “And she saved my life when the cops would have killed me back there in Wolfhunter. So did you.” She says that casually, but I feel it. I feel the look she gives me too. “I been thinking about you a lot, Lanta.”

I don’t say I’ve been thinking about her, too, but it would be true. I have. Not in a serious way; I thought she was long gone out of my life. But there’s something about Vee. Maybe it’s just that dangerous edge I like.

“So what are you doing?” I ask her.

“In general?” Her shoulders rise and fall. “You know. Bummin’ around.”

“You just took off from your foster home?”

“A while back, yeah. Then I found myself at a bus stop not too far away and I thought, hell, why not find you. And here I am.”

That is not Vee’s story. I know she’s lying to me but I don’t know why. “Look, you can stay tonight, but you’ve got to go before my mom gets up in the morning, okay? I’ll get you some food and—”

“Lanta.” She puts both hands on my shoulders and leans close. I freeze. Her eyes are so pretty, and my heart is beating so fast it hurts. “Atlanta Proctor, you don’t have to do nothin’ you don’t want to do. You know that, don’t you? I’ll be gone if you want me gone. Ain’t no big thing.”

I feel warm. Weightless. Strange. I want to run to my mother. I want to kiss this girl. I don’t know what’s going on right now.

I don’t answer. I just lie down and pull the covers up. Vee watches me for a few seconds, then slips in beside me under the sheet and blankets and the heavy duvet, and the sheer animal warmth of her makes me forget how to breathe.

She moves closer, and I can feel heralmosttouching me. I shiver, waiting.

I feel her warm breath on the back of my neck as Vee whispers, “Good night, Lanta.”

I catch myself on a gasp, and reach over and turn the light out.

I don’t think I can sleep at all, having her beside me. My mind is racing. My pulse is too. I feel hot and cold and exhilarated and terrified, and I know none of it is right but I don’t care.I don’t care.I wasn’t even hardly alone with Vee back in Wolfhunter; when I was, there were lots of other problems to worry about. But I’ve spent time thinking about her after that. It feels unreal that she’s just...shown up. Like this is a dream, and when I wake up, she’ll be gone.

When Vee’s arms go around my waist and pull me close, I moan, and it feelsso good. It feels like the best kiss in the world, even though we haven’t kissed at all.

I feel her sigh on the skin at the back of my neck, and then she just...falls asleep. I know she does. I feel her relax. I hear the rhythm of her breath change.

She’s drunk or high or something,I tell myself.You shouldn’t have let her in here. You shouldn’t be in the bed with her right now. Get up.

I don’t.

I fall asleep, too, despite all the fear and uncertainty and longing inside me.

Because as wrong as this is, Vee Crockett makes me feel...safe. And I know that’sverywrong; Vee isn’t a safe person. But maybe it’s just feeling, well, wanted again.

Vee says she came here forme.

Maybe she’s not lying.

When I wake up again, it’s because Vee is moving. She’s pulling her arms back from me, and yawning. I blink at the dull glow from the window. It’s not dawn yet, but it’s coming fast. Mom will be up soon, if she isn’t already.Holy shit, I need to get Vee out of here. Now.

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