Page 13 of Nitro

“Sorry,” I mutter, feeling like a complete pervert.

“Don’t worry, kitten. I’ll keep it in my pants until you tell me you want to see it.”

“Oh my God.” I pull the blankets over my head too quickly and pain shoots through my ribcage. I groan.

“I’ll get you some breakfast. Be right back,” he calls. I can hear the laughter in his voice, and I literally want to die from embarrassment.

The man’s not stupid. He knows what he’s doing. He’s tempting me, which is just cruel since I’m in no condition to handle either him or his giant cock right now. Aside from that, I’m still married. I’ve never been a cheater and I won’t start now, no matter how tempting he might be. As soon as the divorce papers are filed, things will be different. My marriage will be essentially over. Granted, it won’t be official until after the judge dissolves it, but that’s just a technicality. I guess it’s already over, but something about filing the paperwork makes it feel more final, more real. I almost can’t believe it’s actually going to happen. After all these years, after all the times I tried to make things better, it’s over.

Nitro returns with two plates of steaming scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast slathered in butter and huckleberry jam. “Mind if I sit?”

“Sure.” I scoot over to give him room on the bed. He sits beside me before handing me a plate. “This looks amazing. Thank you.”

“Daisy and Crystal made it.”

“They’re new. I don’t remember seeing them around much before.”

“Scar thought it would help keep some of the other brothers calmer if they were getting certain needs met regularly. He dangles them like carrots in front of the prospects too. Those guys can look, but they can’t touch until they’re patched in.”

“Do the girls meet your needs too?” I shove a piece of toast into my mouth and chew violently. I can’t believe I actually asked him that.

“Nah. I’m not into sharing.”

Relief floods me. I shouldn’t care about his sex life at all, but I’m glad he’s not sleeping with the girls out in the kitchen. I wouldn’t be able to look at him the same way if he were screwing random people. Not that it’s any of my business. These feelings I’m having are so strange, and I feel so guilty even thinking about him this way. It’s just hard to avoid it because he’s so damn hot. I must be crazy because the last thing I need right now is another man in my life.

“What about you?” he asks casually. “Have you been with anyone else since you got married?”

“Are you asking me if I’m a cheater?” I drop my half-eaten toast onto the plate and glare at him.

“You’re right. Stupid question. I guess I was just wondering, you know, since your marriage wasn’t good…” He trails off. “Sorry. That was a dumb fucking question. You’re a good girl. I know that.”

“It’s a fair question,” I say, letting him off the hook. “I’ve thought about it.”

“Really?” He gives me his full attention, which is so overwhelming I can’t maintain eye contact. It’s like he can see right into my heart, and it’s totally unnerving.

“The first few years, you have to understand, it wasn’t so bad. But then things got worse, and we weren’t sleeping together, and I got … I get … lonely.”

“And that’s when you’d think about another man?”

“Yeah,” I admit, hanging my head. The guilt I feel when I’m fantasizing about someone else always hit me so hard. I still feel it, even now. Even knowing my marriage is over.

“Did you think about anyone in particular?”

“No,” I whisper. There’s no way in hell I’m going to admit that I’ve only ever thought about one other guy—him.

“Hmm.” Nitro studies me before tucking back into his food. He seems to be considering our conversation, but he doesn’t ask me anything else.Thank God.

I’m hungry enough to polish off everything on my plate. I set it aside and lay back in the bed, closing my eyes. The pain pills are kicking in, and having a warm meal in my belly is making me so tired that all I want to do is go back to sleep.

“I talked to Matrix earlier, and he printed off a new set of divorce papers,” Nitro says.

“Oh?” I open my eyes and sit up again.

“You just need to look them over then sign them. I’ll drive you to the courthouse today so we can get them filed. The guys will come with us, so you’ll be protected at all times. I’d take them myself, but you have to be there to make it official. Also, there are some additional documents you need to bring with you.”

“Like what?”

“Your paycheck stubs, Jeff’s paycheck stubs, bank statements, three years of tax returns, deeds to any real estate, any 401Ks or investment account statements, and anything else that might be considered an asset like your cars.”

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