Page 58 of Nitro

“I want him dead for what he did to you.”

“Me too, but we’ve never been able to get close enough to kill him. He’s too well guarded.”

“You need someone on the inside. Someone close to him.”

“We’ve tried. Trust me, if there were a way, we would have found it already.” He loops an arm around my waist and guides me toward the steakhouse. “I’m thinking of starting with a juicy ribeye, mashed potatoes, and creamed spinach. Then cheesecake. We’re definitely having dessert tonight. At least one each. Maybe two or three different kinds. And drinks. Have you ever had a boulevardier? The cocktail was invented in the 1920s. It’s like a Negroni, but with bourbon instead of gin.”

It’s so obvious he doesn’t want to talk about Blackstone that I let it go. We can talk later. I guess I haven’t been thinking about this the right way. He’s correct that we should be celebrating, but it feels premature. Until that news report goes live, nothing will change. We’re putting our faith in one man. Sure, he’s as trustworthy as they come, but what if this doesn’t work?

As we walk into the restaurant, I push my fears aside. If Nitro wants to enjoy dinner out, then I won’t be the one to ruin it for him. He’s right. I’m too obsessed with anticipating the worst possible outcome. Now that the meeting’s over, I should relax. When I was married, stress and worry were my daily companions. I need to unlearn those fears and try to be happy.

Dinner is an extravagant affair of several courses and three desserts. By the time we’re done, I’m stuffed and can’t possibly take another bite. I didn’t think I’d be able to eat, but the mouthwatering, gorgeously designed plates of food couldn’t be ignored. The desserts were like little works of art, so perfect I almost couldn’t eat them. Fortunately, Nitro didn’t have any qualms about digging in.

When we get back to the clubhouse, Nitro stops in the living room to tell Scar and the others what happened with Reynolds. They clink their beer bottles in celebration. The mood is lighter than it’s been in weeks, and it’s contagious. Soon, I’m sitting on Nitro’s lap, laughing at Talon’s bird calls while Matrix entertains us with silly internet videos.

This is the kind of family I’ve always wanted. One filled with playful happiness. These guys think they lost their humanity while they were Blackstone’s prisoners, but they didn’t. They endured hell and lived. They didn’t lose their joy. It only went into hiding. I hope Nitro realizes this, but if he doesn’t, then I want to be the one to help him reclaim the childish delight he thought he’d lost.

I’m in love with him. It’s terrifying to be in love again but also exhilarating. If Nitro can find happiness after so much trauma, then I can too. We’ll do it together. I want this more than I’ve ever yearned for anything in my life. And now I want him too.

I slide off his lap and hold out my hand. “Coming?”

“Please gag her tonight,” Matrix mutters.

“You guys are terrible!” I throw my head back and laugh.

“Put on your fucking earbuds, bro!” Nitro playfully punches Matrix in the shoulder as he walks by. “Come on, kitten. Let’s show them exactly how loud you can get.”

“Cookie Monster!” I slap his arm.

“Nom nom nom.” He runs after me while I squeal and race toward his bedroom.

After the stress of today, I can’t wait for him to take it all away. And he does. Over and over again until I’m sure Matrix and the others have heard exactly how loud I can scream.

Chapter 17: Nitro

It’s been three weeks since we gave the recording to Reynolds. Nothing has happened yet, but I haven’t given up. Matrix, pretending to be me, contacted him. The reporter said his team was still working on the verification, but so far, everything checked out. I can only hope Reynolds is a man of his word. In the meantime, I’ve been antsy and bored as fuck. Not that Holly’s boring. She’s amazing. But this is the longest I’ve ever gone without some kind of adventure. I’m not talking about the kind in bed either. I mean something fun outside of the house, like skydiving.

“Wait, are you telling me that you want to jump out of a perfectly good plane?” Holly sifts through the brochures spread across my bed. She’s still sweaty and naked from this morning’s sexcapades, just the way I like her.

“It will be fun as fuck.”

“For you. I, on the other hand, will be waving at you from the ground.”

“No way, babe. Come with me.”

“I already did. Twice.” Her wicked grin gets my dick’s attention. Suddenly, leaving the room seems like a bad idea.

“Haven’t you ever wanted to do something a little crazy?” I ask, trying to stay focused.

“When I was in high school, I helped steal the school’s mascot.”

“No shit?”

“Yep. I was a rebel back then. We carried it up a ladder onto the roof of the gym. Then we toilet-papered it. There was a great photo of it in the local paper. The principal pretended to be mad, but I think he was impressed.”

“In that case, we’re definitely going. SkyMountain Adventures isn’t the cheapest option, but they have the longest history in the business. I’m calling them first.”

“No, wait!” She gets on her knees and crawls toward me. “Can’t we just stay here instead?”

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