Page 2 of Enjoying the Ride

“Really?”

She nods, scooting closer in her chair.“Here, check this out.”

Surreptitiously, my friend pulls her phone out of her pants pocket.Kelly looks super cute in her royal blue scrubs, her long blonde hair and azure eyes accented by the color.

I pull at my own emerald green scrubs, wishing I didn’t have to wear a color that made me look like a leprechaun.But Smiley insists that we wear jewel-toned scrubs, so that our office color scheme conveys wealth.

I’m just the dummy who keeps forgetting to do laundry.

Well, it’s not so much aforgetas it is that I hate laundry day.It’s a pain in the butt to have to haul my laundry from my tiny, fifth floor studio all the way down six blocks to the cleanest laundromat where the machines actually work and don’t just eat my money.Such is life in New York.

“So,” Kelly’s voice interrupts my mental tangent.“It sounds a little crazy, but I saw this ad the other day.”She hands me her phone.

I frown as I start to read the blurb.What is this?But then, a nasal voice interrupts my concentration.

“Keeping squinting like that and you’re going to need Botox a lot sooner than you think!”Dr.Smiley interrupts.He ogles me and Kelly, practically salivating with hunger.“My, you two really are a much-needed sight for sore eyes.You girls look so lovely in those colors.”

Even though a tall counter separates us from our boss, I can feel his eyes roaming my body, lingering too long on my lips and then my boobs.

“Dr.Smiley!”Kelly says brightly with a fake smile on her face.“How did the consultation go with Mrs.Ross?”

The disgusting man turns his attention to Kelly.“Good.She needs some work—she’s forty-five and looks it.She’ll call to set up her procedure once she’s had a chance to check her calendar.Mrs.Ross is a VIP, so treat her like it.”

Kelly smiles politely but I’m pretty much ready to throw my stapler at the jerk.Dr.Smiley not only creeps on us, but he treats Kelly and me like we’re complete idiots who don’t know how to engage with his clientele.Neither one of us has ever had a complaint made against us, but it doesn’t stop our boss from being condescending.

“Alright, I’m going to lunch with the CEO of Wagner Bank,” Dr.Smiley flaunts, twisting his wrist to look at his Rolex.Of course, he doesn’treallyneed to check the time— he’s just showing it off.“I did an excellent forehead reduction on his second wife.He’s on his third wife now, but he still owes me.”

With that, our boss swans off without a proper goodbye or even wave.Kelly and I roll our eyes almost in unison.

“What, he didn’t get paid for his time?”Kelly snorts once he’s out of earshot, picking up her phone once more.“This guy is a piece of work.God, could he get any grosser?”

“Let’s not tempt fate,” I advise.“Because I have no doubt that a guy like Ray Smiley could bea lotmore disgusting, if given the chance.”

“Yeah, you’re right.Okay, enough about that weirdo,” Kelly sighs, handing me her phone once more.“Look at this.This is what we should do instead of working here.”

“A beauty pageant?”I blink, cocking an eyebrow as I scan the information.“Why are you showing me an ad about a beauty pageant?”

My friend shrugs, her blonde strands swishing as she does so.“Go on, just read the rest of the flyer.”

I finish reading the rest of the advertisement, muttering out loud as I do so.

“Beauty pageant seeking female contestants between the ages of 18-25.Grand prize is $100,000 —a hundred thousand dollars?”I practically screech.“Are you kidding me?”

Kelly giggles.“Keep going,” she urges me.

“‘Final winner will be offered a long-term position working on a Caribbean island.’”

I hand my friend back her mobile without saying anything.

“It’s kind of fascinating, right?I mean, a Caribbean island?”Kelly asks, her eyes skimming the ad once more.“So, do you want to sign up and do it with me?”

I can’t control the look of surprise that crosses my face.

I’m not pretty enough to be in a beauty pageant!

Don’t get me wrong— I think I’m cute, if rosy cheeks, wide hips, and big boobs are your thing.But if I think about traditional beauty pageants, with all the waifs and super-model tallness… well, I’m hardly the right candidate for such an event.

“Me?Participate in a beauty pageant?”I can’t help but scoff, wondering when the heck Kelly completely lost her mind.“No way, I wouldn’t stand a chance.Why would I want to embarrass myself?”

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