Page 149 of The Drummer

He shakes his head and drops his hand from the strings.

The silence is loud without the drone of the guitar. Maybe that’s his point.

“I couldn’t play, Case,” he whispers. “I didn’t deserve the transformation after what I did.”

I wince, angry and heartbroken at the same time.

“Elena wouldn’t have wanted that,” I reply. My eyes drift to the mirror where I find his locked on me. “Your music was the only thing she still believed in at the end.”

He flinches, but his gaze stays glued on mine. He doesn’t hide from it anymore.

I swallow a thick lump in my throat. It’s time for another truth. Maybe if I’d told him in the beginning, we wouldn’t have gotten to this point. But I couldn’t, and now I see why. I wanted to punish him too. Deep down, despite what I told my conscience, I blamed him. Just like everyone else did. And when he left, I turned the blame on myself.

“The day before…” I stumble on the words and force in a deep breath.

Luke’s fingers clench around the neck of his guitar.

Say it. You have to tell him.

“The day before what happened, she texted me. I’d sent her the rough mix of ‘Catastrophe.’”

I sense his strong reaction. His shock. He knows where I’m going with this.

I scrub rogue tears from my eyes.

“I didn’t know at the time,” I continue in a strangled tone. “I didn’t make the connection because I didn’t see it until you told us she wanted to reconcile that night.”

I blink back to him, my heart a tangled mass in my chest. “It was the song, Luke. Your music. That’s what sent her back to you that night. She heard ‘Catastrophe’ and remembered how much she loved you.”

Tears flow down his cheeks as he gazes at me in stunned silence. My own vision blurs, but I can’t move. I don’t know what to do with that truth any more now than I did then. I didn’t even know it was a truth until this moment.

He rubs at his eyes, his chest rising and falling in uneven breaths.

“Casey? Do you…” His words crumble around us.

I blink more tears down my cheeks as I wait.

After a long silence he clears his throat and tries again. “Doyou think she hears us?” He turns to me with earnest grief and hope. “Wherever she is, do you think I can still play for her somehow?”

I have no idea. I don’t know how I could. But some questions are more about the answer than the question.

“Yeah, man,” I say in a hoarse tone. “You can definitely play for her.”

I don’t know if my sister will ever hear her song, but we’ll damn well make sure the rest of the world does.

Luke’s relieved smile breaks through the thick shadows around him. For a brief moment, light returns to his eyes. He focuses back on his guitar, and I slowly push up from the bed.

But before I can take a step, his guitar goes silent. I twist back to find his gaze on me again.

“I want to come back, Case,” he whispers. “I want to play for her again. I want to rewrite the ending of this story the way she’d want it.”

More emotion burns behind my eyes. I force a nod.

“I want that too.”

A thought passes over him as he searches my face. “I… Um…” He briefly looks away before finding my eyes again. “I’m glad you and Callie found each other. Truly. But do you think… Can you convince her to stay? I think I need her if I’m going to do this. I need both of you.”

I swallow the lump in my throat and blink back the threatening pressure. My heart is bursting, my brain spinning.

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