Page 12 of Broken

“I’m doing it,” King counters, lugging in all my stuff that Nicole brought. She brought so much that I’m almost tempted to find out if I’m having a girl or a boy. That way, I’d know if all these clothes are going to work. Sure, there are some unisex things like green onesies, some yellow and red. Same with a few of the gowns that fold down to cover their nails, so they don’t scratch their face. Still, I don’t know what it says about me, but I’m not going to put my son in a pink Minnie Mouse dress. Imightput my girl in the green striped—clearly boy themed—baseball uniform, complete with a tiny hat.It’s adorable.“Where do you want these?” he adds, interrupting my thoughts.

“Just stack them up there by the door. I get my car tomorrow and I’m going to haul them to my new place.”

“New place?”

“Yeah. I’m going to move into my apartment early. I already spoke to my new landlord. I pulled the money from my savings. He’s going to meet me with the keys, and I can move straight in.”

“Why are you moving? Wouldn’t it be safer for you and the baby to be around people who care about you?”

“Because that’s not my life. I don’t know what my life is going to be, but I don’t belong here.”

“Gabby, they like you. It’s clear you’re more than welcome at the club.”

“King, you’re no stranger to club life. There are two kinds of women that lives in residence at a clubhouse. Club candy or old ladies. I am neither of those, nor do I have a desire to be.”

“There’s nothing wrong with club life, Gabby.”

“I know that, King. I just know it’s not the life for me.”

He frowns at me, and I can tell my words piss him off. I don’t want him mad at me. It’s more than that, however. I don’t want him to think that I look down on his way of life. Nothing could be further from the truth. Instinctively, I reach out and put my hand on his bicep, squeezing, even though it doesn’t really work. His muscles are too big and solid. Still, I hope he can feel my somewhat lame attempt to get his attention.

“I’m damaged goods, King. There are scars inside of me I don’t see ever being healed. I definitely am not made to be a Twinkie. I never was. I could have been happy as an old lady, but there was one part I never liked, a part I could never get used to, a part that turned me into an insecure bitch.”

“Explain it to me,” King invites.

It’s then I notice I’m still holding his arm. I go to move it away, but King just grabs my hand and sandwiches mine between his and his bicep.Okay. Message Received.For some reason, King wants my hand connected to him. I don’t understand why, but I’m not going to question it. The man has always been intense. I’ve been around enough ultra-alpha-badass-men to know when to pick my battles.Now is not that time.So, I keep my hand where it’s at with just a shake of my head.

“Dom was always going to club parties. Even when we were together—I meantogether, together.”

“That’s not unheard of. Brothers?—”

“I grew up in a club. I know it’s not unheard of. I also know what happens with Twinkies at these parties. I trusted Dom. I did. It may seem like I didn’t, but back then, he told me he loved me. I only had eyes for him, and I believed him.”

“Then what happened? Cause I got to tell you from everything you’ve told me that doesn’t seem to track.”

“There was a Twinkie at the club—Mony. She hated me. It wasn’t because I knew her, I didn’t. It wasn’t because I was creating shitstorms the likes mortal eyes have never seen until I unleashed bitch-from-the-ninth-level-of-hell Gabby. Mony didn’t like me purely because shelikedDom. I didn’t know it at the time, but he had tasted her wares often. I’m not sure when it began. I know Dom was my first, and he told me I was his, but somewhere along the line a seal was broken, and she got a taste of him. A taste she liked.”

“Fuck, this sounds like junior high shit.”

“It felt like life and death back then. Now, after seeing the darkness that the world holds up-close and personal, I figure you’re right.”

“Is there a point to this?”

“That day, Dom left my bed to go to a party and about an hour later, I received a text from another she-bitch-from-hell Twinkie and Mony’s bestie. Dom getting a ride of the personal kind from Mony in all her naked glory while sucking off one of the other brothers. That began my descent into being a monster, when I should have just walked away. Instead, I called Dom and told him I was sick and asked if he cared to come over because my parents were gone all weekend and I felt so bad. I laid it on thick and lied out of my ass. I asked him to swing by a local dive and bring me some of their soup to see if I could hold it down.”

“Let me guess, he didn’t come by.”

“Worse. I had to leave a voicemail because he didn’t even pick up his phone. Another hour went by and still no word, so desperation sank inside of me. Mony used to talk a lot of shit. She called me a Barbie doll men might like on their arm, but I couldn’t satisfy one and that’s where she came in. I laughed in her face and told her she didn’t know my man. She returned the favor, saying I was the clueless one. I let her in my head. I let Dom break my heart. For the next two months, I’d get weekly porn videos featuring the love of my life and Mony or one of her buddies, sometimes Monyandone of her buddies.”

“Gabby—”

“AndIstilldidn’t grow a pair and confront him. Istilldidn’t walk away.”

“Sweetheart …”

“Do you know what I did, King?”

“What?”

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