Page 59 of Broken

“King …” His name comes out a soft whisper. I can barely hear it over my own ragged breathing. I love it when he calls me that. It happens only when he’s brought me down from my climax, but each time it’s beautiful. This time, his fingers are still sliding against my clit, moving slowly now as my orgasm continues to dissipate, and it is even sweeter than the other times. I lick my lips as I look into his dark, fathomless eyes. His eyes hold secrets and as the days turn into weeks, I find I want to know every one of them.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he groans. “I’m going to kiss you, Gabby. You keep your eyes open if you need to. You remember who you are giving this body to. You remember me,” he instructs, and it almost makes me smile. He’s become such a presence in my life, my mind, and yes,my heart. It makes keeping the horrible memories away easier. It still happens—it did tonight. I’m just saying that those thoughts don’t take over like they once did. I can beat them back—with his help.

His kiss is no less gentle than anything else I’ve shared with him. Yet this time there’s a fire spreading through me that is more intense than before. My body is urging me to take more ofeverything this man offers. It’s so powerful that I moan as his tongue tries to control mine. He swallows down the sound and somehow deepens the kiss. It’s sublime—pure magic, and it is the best kiss I’ve had in my life.

For a moment, those old thoughts push through me, but I beat them back as my hand slides down his stomach. Just the gentle touch of my fingers sliding against his taut abdomen allows me to feel the power and muscle he carries. It should intimidate me. With my history, itabsolutelyshould. Instead, I feel safe and cared for. It’s a heady sensation, the likes of which I’ve not truly felt since my father used to spoil me. He slowly got away from that—thinking Dom was taking up that job. If he had bothered to watch how Dom was at his club or around his brothers, he would have known better. Yet I did my part in making him believe that’s how it was. So, I can’t lay all the blame on him. Plus, I was older—supposedly an adult.I wasn’t,but I played at being an adult, at least until it was all ripped away from me. Nothing like being hit, cut with a knife, and raped to take the ol’ blinders off.

I beat down those memories again, just as I push away the thoughts of my own past sins. I can’t allow them a way in right now. Later, they can swamp me when I’m alone. Later, I will drown in them. Not now. Not with King. Here, I let myself pretend I can be enough for him. Here, it can only be me and King—at least until he discovers I’m not worth his time.

With that thought—and that alone—I let my hand move down, then move even further down until my hand wraps around the base of his cock. Being nude with him isn’t easy. It’s something he only introduced a couple of days ago. He keeps it dark in here, with just the light from the bathroom slowly drifting in. My body is usually covered too. He takes my panties off, but I wear his T-shirt to bed, and I keep it on. I know he wishes he had free access to my body. I see the hunger inhis eyes as he brings me to climax. Yet, he never pushes for more. He never makes me feel lacking. I trusted him before. If I hadn’t, I’d never be able to do what we’re doing. Yet since becoming intimate with him, that trust has grown substantially. I have complete faith in him. Tonight is the first night King has come to bed without gym shorts or joggers on. He’s completely nude. Although he’s kept his body under the sheet, his body has touched mine and I haven’t felt fear—which surprised me. No, the fact he’s naked only increased my desire for more—which has been the biggest shock of all.

“Sunshine,” he groans, his entire body tensing. “You don’t have to do this.”

I contract my hand, squeezing him. He feels like heated velvet, and it’s as intoxicating as it is addicting. He’s so …large. Bigger than I was prepared for. My fingers don’t reach around him. The man could probably tear me in half, but I can’t imagine caring. I know without a doubt that King would take care of me. I’ve never had that confidence in a man before—at least not since my very first time with Dom. It should scare me how much faith I have in King, but it doesn’t.

He's my safe haven.

“I want to touch you, King. Please?” I ask, needing him to understand.

“I’m yours for whatever you want, Gabby. You know that. I’m all yours, woman.”

My heart turns a somersault in my chest.I want him to be mine.I fucked everything up and made that impossible before I ever even met him. He doesn’t see it right now,but he will. Still, this is the here and now. For as long as he’s with me, I’m going to do my best to enjoy the moments I have with him.

I stare into his eyes as I hold him firmly and then slide my hand up, keeping my grip firm. I twist as I hit the crown of his cock, then move back down. I pump him slowly, my gaze lockedwith his. I want to watch him. King doesn’t hide his pleasure from me either. I see it on his face and especially in his eyes. I lose myself in the bliss bleeding through his features and I pick up my face. For a second his eyes close and without him returning my stare, I start to question if what I’m doing is right. King is older than me. He’s been married and a member of a club for a long time. I know from experience this means he can get laid anytime he feels the need. It’s more than that, though. It’s simply … a man that looks like he does could have any woman he came across. That’s not an exaggeration. He’s that spectacular. Now doubts hit me. A man like King would think a hand job was lame, mostly because it is. On this thought, my stroke falters.Shit.What was I thinking? King must think I’m a clueless juvenile. Part of me wishes I could be confident with a man. No, that’s wrong. I wish with everything in me I could be confident withKing. That I could be the woman he deserves. Most of all, I wish I didn’t make it completely impossible for the two of us to work.

I hadn’t realized that I closed my own eyes until I feel King’s hand move against the side of my face. “Where are you, Sunshine?”

“Lost in my head. It’s not a great place to be,” I admit quietly.

“You forgot our golden rule, sweetheart.”

“What’s that?” I ask, my voice sounding different—even to my own ears.

“When we’re together, your mind, your body, and your thoughts are to only be on me and what we are together. You look atme. You feel shit trying to push through, you focus onme.You usemeto get you through it. Understand?”

I lick my lips. It’s not the first time he’s told me this. I imagine it won’t be the last, but every single time he says it, my body quivers in response.

“Yeah,” I breathe, unable to say anything more.

His hand slides down, moving over my own. He captures mine under his and presses against his shaft. “I love your hands on me, Gabby. I love your touch. Anything you want, I’m here for. Nothing has ever felt better,” he says, like he somehow knows that I need his reassurance.

With him guiding the way, our hands begin slowly sliding up his shaft and then back down. I keep focused on King’s beautiful face. There’s something extremely erotic and sexy having his hand move with mine as we work his cock. I watch as desire sparks first in his eyes and then moves over his features. I feel the inside of my thighs grow damp in answer. With my free hand I reach out, spreading my fingers against the solid wall of his chest, biting my lip, as the heat of his body slides into mine—from just one single touch—ignites. It’s intense and unlike anything I’ve ever known. I lick my lips again, fighting urges I thought I’d never feel again.

“What do you want, Sunshine?” his deep voice practically purrs.

My mouth suddenly feels dry. Fear. I can feel it trying to push through, but I do as King has always told me and I concentrate on him. “I … Can I … I need to touch you,” I whisper.

“You are touching me, sweetheart,” he responds, his voice a groan as we continue jacking him off. I can feel his precum sliding down from his head and over my fingers. I need more and I’m going to try for it—beforeI can talk myself out of it.

“Will you lay back for me?” I ask. My voice is timid, but I don’t look away. It’s taking all the courage I have, but I want this.I want to bring King as much pleasure as he brings me.

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?” he asks. I can read it all on his face. The hunger, the need, the worry. It’s all there bared for me to see. King’s hiding nothing and that more than anything gives me confidence.

“I need this. Let me love you, King.”

Those words expose a lot. I hadn’t meant to say them. Still, King’s a man, he won’t know their significance. He’ll think I’m talking about sex.I’m not.I love King. It started as friendship and trust. It has deepened by being around him, watching him, and accepting how wonderful he’s been to me. There’s so much to love about King, there’s no way to list or express it all. I realize it’s foolish to give it to him. I’ve already made it impossible for us to ever work. King doesn’t realize that yet. He will in time. Still, the love I feel is mine to give and for as long as I have with him, I’m going to give it to him freely.

He stares at me as if trying to figure out exactly where my head is at. “Climb on top of me, Gabby,” he responds, finally deciding. “You’re in control of what we do. You are in complete control.”

---