Page 123 of Sunrise

But I’m not here for them. I’m here for me. I don’t even care if that makes me selfish.

To be a Domme, for me, means I think of my desires first. And I’ll do what I want to fulfill them. It just so happens that my desires are to make others happy. I love encouraging my subs to come out of their shells of shame and embrace the kinks they like. Even better is when I get to give them those things.Whipping, flogging, edging…

Joining this lifestyle was such a game changer for me. I discovered myself in ways that no book could teach me. As someone who grew up in a very conservative, religious family, I couldn’t wait to get away from my family because I was always suffocating and lonely. My childhood was spent either studying or doing a sport. Other than that, I didn’t get out much. My parents wouldn’t allow me to hang out with anyone they didn’t think was following the path of God. Little did they know I was an atheist.

Once I hit college, I never looked back. And after Christopher attacked me and I had to testify in court, my family saw me differently. The shame I brought to them by being a dominatrix was more powerful than their love for me as their only daughter who was attacked by a sick man. They said a woman who plays the devil’s games is bound for Hell and that they’d pray for my soul. I haven’t spoken to them since. I don’t miss them.

But I’d miss being a Domme if I had to stop.

A few months ago, Ryker asked me if I wanted to take over managing his other sex club, The Luna. It’s brand new and on the opposite side of town. The clientele isn’t the same as the one at the Monarch, but kinks are kinks and dominating is dominating. Whether it’s attached to an astronomical membership fee, or an affordable one, doesn’t matter. I turned him down because the Monarch Club is my home. Not the Luna. If I can’t be myself here…

“Tip your head for me, baby.” Vault pours shampoo on my hair and massages it in. “It’s gotten so long.”

“Hmm?”

“Your hair. I was thinking about that last night.”

“This is the length it was before I had to run.”

He rinses my hair thoroughly, then conditions it next. I’ve honestly never seen him this attentive before. It’s usually me giving him aftercare. Spinning around, I run my hands up his abs, pecs and shoulders. He has a jagged scar on his left shoulder cap. “Are you going to tell me how you got this?”

“I did already.” He’s got this adorable, lopsided grin. “It’s from a hippo.”

I bite my bottom lip, failing to hide my smile. He always comes up with random, outrageous explanations for this particular scar. “Ahippo? I thought it was an alien attack.”

“A hippo alien attack. They robbed me blind and were never caught.”

I chuckle at his terrible story. Vault’s different lately. This change in him opens a whole deeper level for me to fall in love with.

“Knox’s dad shot me,” he says, with no humor in his tone.

My stomach drops. “What?”

“It was a long time ago. His dad was out of his head and had him at gunpoint. I distracted him. It gave Knox a chance to run, and I got off easy with just a bullet graze.” He shrugs the scarred shoulder. “Helluva badge of honor. He’s saved me more times than I can count, so it’s nice to have been able to return the favor.”

My god. I… I have no words.

Immediately, the image of Knox’s gun tattoo comes to mind with the wordssave meon the barrel. It hits differently now that I know the story of Vault’s scar.

The history they have is so deep, I doubt I’ll ever reach the bottom of it.

“D sewed me up,” he says, like it’s no biggie.

“You didn’t go to the hospital?”

“That would raise too many flags. Knox didn’t want his father in trouble for it, and the gun that was used was mine and unregistered. Which was also extremely illegal.”

“You had agunwhen you were in high school?”

We’re from very different worlds. I’ve never even held a gun in my hands, much less owned one.

“I bought it for reasons other than what you think.”

“You don’t even know what I’m thinking.”

“I tried to kill myself,” he confesses, stunning me.

He’s right. Ineverwould have thought he’d get a gun for that.

---