Page 69 of Sunrise

Everyone has a before and after moment that changes who they are at their core. Some people are unfortunate to have more than one of those moments.

I’m unfortunate.

Kissing Vault for the first time changed me.

Picking him up off the bathroom floor after that shattering weekend with his teacher changed me.

Being asked to fuck him to replace one bad dick for another changed me.

But murdering that piece of shit teacher? Thatmademe.

I always knew I’d be good at something. Turns out, me and fire have a pretty tight relationship. We’re solid, bro. The flames never let me down. Not when I cook at Midnight Run, and most definitely not the day I tortured that motherfucking rapist and set his dirty secret child abuse hostel on fire with him inside it.

It was a miracle I made it out unscathed, which, honestly, I consider an act of divine intervention. I was out of my head that day with anger and grief and just exploded—no pun intended.

Does Alex think I’m a monster for what I did? I don’t give a fuck. Iama monster. And I’d do it again in a heartbeat. If it sends me to Hell, Lucifer bettermove out of my way because his throne will belong to me once I get there.

This is the one secret no one else knows about.

And now I’ve shared it.

It’s all good. I have zero regrets. If I’d died while taking that fucker out of this world, it would have been worth it. If I’d somehow gotten caught and spent life in prison for murder… also worth it. But like I said, the universe was on my side, and I’ve been happily running free, knowing Alex is safe and always will be, because of me.

You thought Dmitri was the overprotective one in our friend circle? Please. Hold my fucking beer.

But murderers can’t brag about their handiwork, so I never told a soul. Sharing this info now seems necessary, which is the only reason I’ve finally caved. If this is the last bit of closure Alex needs, then I’ve wrapped it in a pretty, charred bow and given it to him.

He’s not saying a word. I’m not sure he’s breathing. That’s okay, he probably needs time to process it. I’ve had plenty of time to do that already, so I can tell you that patience is key here.

“You killed him.”

It’s not a question or a statement. I’m not sure what it is, but his voice sounds strangled.

“You…you really killed him.”

I finish off my sandwich and keep quiet.

“You did that.”

“I did that,” I finally say, hoping to move the processing along faster. “And I’d do it again.”

Vault sits back, the air rushing out of him. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

I shove a couple chips in my mouth.

He slams his fist on the table. “Whydidn’t youfuckingtell me, Knox?”

“I didn’t think a murder confession was the smartest idea since I never wanted to get caught,genius.”

He’s so fucking angry he shoves away from the table. His chair scrapes across the hardwood floor, making me instantly tense up. That sound was always followed by violence in my house growing up.

Is Vault going to hit me for what I did?

Jesus, I think so.

I guess I’d be mad at me too if I were him. We shared everything together—the good and the bad—until we shared nothing at all.

“You let me believe…” He steps away. “You’ve fucking let me torture myself all this time thinking he died quick when…” He grips the side of his head. “Fuck, Knox!”