Page 24 of I Always Will

“Oh, my god,” Alexandria whispered. She was dying. At fifteen. Which was a terrible idea because she needed to make it to thirty-five so she could marry Hailey.

Hailey smirked up at her and Alexandria was worried she’d given herself away and Hailey knew exactly what she was thinking. But she didn’t say anything. She handed a sheet of paper to Alexandria—one copy of the contract. “We’ve got to get it down on paper so we know it’s real. Nobody can argue it then. And if it’s still illegal for two women to get married when we’re thirty-five, well, we’ll show them our contract and argue that they have to let us get married because we have a contract.”

“I’m not sure that’s how it works.” Alexandria heard how wobbly and weak her voice was. She was grateful Hailey either didn’t notice or didn’t comment.

“Tough shit. That’s how it works now.” She handed Alexandria the pen. “We have a contract and, if neither of us is married to someone else by then, in twenty years, we’re getting married and we’ll beofficialbest friends forever.”

“Sure. Forever…” She stared at the contract Hailey had written out.The Contract of the Davis-Daleys, as she’d titled it. “Your surname cannot be Daley. Hailey Daley? It’s ridiculous.”

Hailey laughed. “Hailey Daley is an amazing name. It makes me sound famous, but don’t worry, that’s why we’re hyphenating. Now, sign.”

Alexandria felt like this was their wedding. Her hand shook as she moved to sign her name on the dotted line Hailey had drawn, first on her own copy and then on Hailey’s.

Logically, she knew it wasn’t real. Hailey was just being funny. She’d lose the contract in a few days, never mention it again, and Alexandria would nurse her broken heart for a few weeks and finally get over Hailey.

But what if she kept it? What if they did get married in twenty years? They’d be friends forever, of course, so what if they did just keep moving towards their thirty-fifth birthdays and just… got married?

Hailey signed both of the contracts before carefully placing hers into a plastic wallet and storing it in her bag. Alexandria stared at her own for a moment longer before slipping it into her bedside table.

Hailey smiled triumphantly and placed her hands on her hips. “Great. Well, I’ll see you at our wedding in twenty years, Mrs. Davis-Daley.”

Nine

Present day

Hailey slid the old plastic wallet around her coffee table using the tip of one finger. She shouldn’t have taken it out, not really. She was just tormenting herself. It—and she—would have been better off if she’d just left it in that box in the attic, the one she pretended not to know it was in.

Instead, she’d let her mind wander to it a million times over the last few days. Honestly, she’d been letting her mind wander to it for months, ever since thirty-five had been looming. So, when her phone had dinged with a message from Alexandria, rather than Esme or Dan as she’d been expecting, ignoring it any longer had been a lost cause. She had half-panicked at Alexandria’s name on the alert, jumped out of her seat, and found herself clambering up into the dusty attic before she’d given it a second thought. She hadn’t even read the message before she was tearing the lid off the box in question and fishing through it for the plastic wallet with the twenty-year-old, fake contract in it.

She didn’t know why she’d kept it. Well, she did, but she liked to pretend she didn’t. Things were easier if she pretended not to know, if she acted like it was a coincidence that she still had it, like it had been thrown in a box and forgotten long ago. As it probably should have been.

It was embarrassing to look at these days. Back when she’d written it, when she was still just a kid, she’d known it was silly, something they were probably too old to be doing at fifteen, but she’d liked the momentary hope it gave her. She liked the way Alexandria had become so flustered over it, too. That had given her hope her feelings might be reciprocated, even just for a minute.

When she had left the Daley household with it tucked safely in her bag, she had been certain Alexandria was going to throw hers away in no time, because really, who held onto contracts their teenage self made to marry their best friend?

Hailey, apparently.

For whatever reason, over the years, through moving houses and jobs and the changing seasons of life, she had never gotten rid of it. She didn’t look at it often, but it stayed with her. The last vestige of hope that Alexandria might come back to her, that they might still have something.

Well, she’s back.

She wasn’t back for Hailey, though. She was back for her brother, of course, and it was just beyond bad luck that she was back when they were both thirty-five. It was even worse that a wedding was what had brought them back together. This was supposed to be the year they got married, not the year they awkwardly helped Alexandria’s brother get married to Hailey’s friend.

How was Dan even old enough to get married? It felt like only yesterday that he’d been toddling around the Daley household while Hailey trailed after the best friend she was in love with. It made her feel old. Though time was good for one thing—it might not have erased Alexandria for her but she didn’t feel so desperately sad at the loss of her relationship with Matt anymore. It was sad, but even being around Alexandria and Dan and their sibling dynamic wasn’t hurting Hailey in the way she knew it might have once.

Not for the first time, she wondered whether, if she’d simply been honest about why she was so eager to marry Alexandria, they’d still be friends. Would they have been something more? If she’d come right out and said she was looking for a way to be with Alexandria forever, would they have gotten married? Would Dan have spent years being Hailey’s brother too? Would the pain of mostly cutting off her family have healed quicker because she and Alexandria would have built a new one together?

Still spinning the document on the table, she finally opened the message.

In another foolish decision, ridiculously designed to save face, she’d been acting like her usual self in the group chat. Or, she’d been acting as close to her usual self as she could while knowing Alexandria was seeing all her messages. She’d decided that, if she didn’t want to have to explain to Esme and Dan, she needed to be her usual self. And, if she did that, perhaps Alexandria would simply forget everything that had happened between them.

From her reaction at Mash-N-Go, she hadn’t forgotten Hailey entirely, but she’d probably forgotten most things. Hopefully, she’d forgotten the contract and the horror of them being brought back together in this of all years.

But then, she hadn’t responded to a single message in the group for two days. She’d seen them, but she hadn’t engaged once. And that worried Hailey.

Alexandria was prompt, reliable, and quick to get back to people. She did not sit on messages for two days for no reason.

The reason was obviously Hailey and however much Alexandria remembered. Hailey wished she could wash it all away—not for herself, just for Alexandria, so they could pretend nothing had happened. She needed those memories for herself. And so, Hailey had become a more exaggerated version of herself to make everything okay. She’d been way more enthusiastic about flowers than she ever had in her life. She’d talked at length about topping combinations for the catering. As if she didn’t already know exactly the kind of set up that would suit Esme. She’d been Hailey turned up to the max.

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