Page 6 of Crescendo

I nodded slowly. “I’m really doing it. Something for me. Remembering who I am. Or, maybe not even that, maybe just learning who I am now, what I want, what I like, what I want to be.”

“You’ll be telling us you’re changing career next,” Sian said lightly, and I couldn’t have found the words for how grateful I was for how they were handling this. They always knew exactly what I needed.

I laughed. “I don’t think that’s on the horizon. I love my job. It’s all I trained for. Radiology is my life.”

Alisha nudged me slightly. “It has been, but this is your moment, your opportunity to make it more than that.”

I looked at her, a million emotions flooding through me. That was the goal, that was the point. This was the moment that I was ready to accept the life I actually had and not the one I wished I had, but I’d wanted to be a radiologist since I was a child. I didn’t think that was going anywhere.

My eyes were pulled to the room around us.Music.That was what I wanted now.

I cleared my throat and spoke in a whisper. “I think I might want to take a music class or something.”

Sian’s eyebrows shot up her head. “For you? Or for Callum?”

“For me.” For him too, but not in the way she meant it, I didn’t think.

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah. It’s been really helpful lately. And I don’t think I’m ready to pick up my clarinet again, but I think music theory or composition or something.” I felt my cheeks heating up and my heart pounding in my chest. “That feels reallynecessaryright now.”

They both smiled at me and I felt my eyes welling up again. Nobody could ever prepare you for the grieving process—even the people walking you through it couldn’t make it make sense—but nothing about it had gone remotely the way I’d have imagined before I experienced it.

Sian cleared her throat. “I think I might have something for you.”

My stomach swooped. Whatever she had felt like it was pulling at something inside of me, even before I knew what it was.

And, when she’d finished explaining about Crescendo, the tears were rolling down my cheeks and I felt more real than I had in years—and like Callum was closer to me than he had ever been. I knew I had to do it. The timing was perfect, too. He was sending me this and I needed to go. Iwantedto go. I wasn’t sure when the last time I’d wanted something like this had been, but, now that it was happening, I couldn’t let it go to waste.

Chapter 3

Lydia

I jostled off the plane together with the rest of the crowds, packed in like sardines being extruded from a tube, and I sent Melinda a text as soon as the wi-fi connected.

Just landed in Heathrow. I hate international flights. If you need me, I’ll be a posh British pupil of the arts with a lovely cup of tea in a South Kensington flat.

Heathrow was an airport like any other, but mostly I was just glad to stop traveling, having left LAX early afternoon yesterday and—what do you know—I couldn’t sleep on planes. I wasn’t quite with it. I strode across the terminal, my carryon suitcase rolling behind me as I weaved between people, and Melinda responded as I was queuing for passport control.

You’re going to be the worst person I know for the next two months, aren’t you

How rude. I’d been the worst person she’d known for the entirety of our relationship. Now she was acting like I’d only just managed that spot?

After an eternity standing in line like cattle, I was finally herded through passport control where a man who looked like he’d rather be anywhere than here made sure I wasn’t herefor terrorism or human trafficking, and I made my way out to arrivals, where I had to scan the crowds to find a sign with the Crescendo logo on it and, handwritten above it,Lydia Howard Fox.The woman holding it up was a tall, curvy Black woman probably in her late twenties, a tall natural Afro hairstyle and a sleek pantsuit accentuated with piles of glamorous jewelry. Stylish woman. My opinion dropped a little when I got through the crowds to her and saw she was also wearing the worst heels known to man, bright jade green sandal heels with a kind of… snakeskin pattern? I hoped to God it was just a pattern.

“Miss Lydia Howard Fox,” the woman said with a sly smile my way as I came up to her. She had a rich Londoner accent, very posh, very RP. Maybe she was rich and that was why she was allowed to get away with that choice of shoe. “It’s an honor to meet you in person.”

I put out a hand for her. “Please, just call me Lydia. I can’t take beingMiss Lydia Howard Foxlike I’m a royal.”

She gave me a quick handshake, slipping the sign into her purse. “I must admit, it’s only a… a touch unusual to have Lydia Howard Fox herself here and to refer to her as Lydia. But it’s absolutely a pleasure. My name is Olivia Gould, and I’ll be your Crescendo program liaison for the next two months.”

“Oh, I have a liaison? We’re pulling out all the stops.”

She smiled wider. “Don’t get a big head, now, Lydia. It’s six people per liaison, so you’ll be sharing me. I’m afraid we can’t offer special treatment just because you’re a living legend who is, for some God-forsaken reason, taking a crash course.”

“Well, I guess I’ll have to do my best to outdo the other five. I’m very competitive, I’ll have you know.” I stood back as the luggage carousel shuddered with a groan and started rolling, the first of the suitcases marching out from the back. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Olivia. I look forward to being… liaisoned. Speaking of, what exactly does a liaison do?”

“First of all—make sure that you make it to South Ken in one piece. The Tube is a bit unforgiving for newcomers. Second is to make sure that you can attend the orientation, which will already be just a touch… tight, considering the timing at the moment. Third is to make sure you have everything you need in the program. And of course, finally, to make sure you don’t cause catastrophic problems for everybody involved.”

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