Page 95 of Crescendo

Luckily, I found Bansi straightaway, which immediately made it clear who had made this whole thing into a party.

“Lydia,” he said, beaming at me, turning away from his conversation with a girl I recognized as Rosie and her friend. “So good of you to join us!”

“So good of you to throw a party in my own apartment without even saying a word to me,” I said, my voice mock-chastising. He gave me an innocent look.

“Me? I don’t know what you mean.”

“Come off it. You made a party because you made too much food again.”

He gestured at Clara. “It’s not my fault! She didn’t eat enough!”

With Clara playing the cello and Ella on the piano, I decided to invite myself into the situation, walking past Clara and picking up the violin from the corner. They were clearly playing something spontaneous, so I joined in, standing next to the piano to make eye contact with Ella, and I concentrated hard on the way it felt—performing,like this, feeling the way the music flowed naturally when I was here syncing up with Ella Hendrickson.

Olivia was right—I liked the music when I was doing this. And maybe that made all the difference. But how was that actually helpful?

I didn’t know. All I knew was that I liked Ella, a lot. And maybe that was what drove me, once we’d finished the song, to set down the violin and peck Ella on the cheek, claiming her in front of everyone.

“A bit of that Chopin you were studying,” I said. “I can see the inspiration.”

“Ha—it’s not intentional. I just soak up whatever I was looking at last.” She was apparently on the same page as me, because even here in full view of everyone, she slipped off the piano bench and stood up, pressing a quick kiss to my lips before she stepped back, eyes sparkling, a little flush visible on her cheeks.

“So, the party is because Bansi made too much food,” I said, and she laughed, hanging her head.

“How long did it take you to piece that together?”

“The instant I saw Bansi in here. Same amount of time it would take you.”

But I didn’t mind it—getting to talk to the rest of the program, Ella on my arm, just clearly holding her to my side, girlfriend in all but name.

And in practice, since our time together here was rapidly slipping away. And having to go without her was going to be the worst blow to my inspiration that I’d ever gotten.

So maybe it was the act of being cute together in front of everybody with her, tacitly admitting what everybody more or less knew at this point—including Ella’s friends Alisha and Sian, who had also gotten wrapped up in the party without meaning to and who gave me very loaded looks, Sian making a veiled comment aboutenjoying the gifts we’re givenand me making it very overt by respondingoh, yes, that reminds me, thanks for your present, it’s been a lot of fun,mostly to watch Ella melt into the floorboards—maybe all of that was what had me sit down next to Ella on the music room couch at the end of it all and decide I couldn’t keep it inside me any longer.

“Ella?”

“Nope. I’m still mad you said that to Sian.”

Well, her face didn’t look that mad. She looked adorably scrunched up. “What?” I said. “Youhaveseemed to be having fun when we use it.”

“And now I’m not letting you use it tonight unless you tell me you’reveryvery sorry.”

I laughed. “I think this is the best scolding I’ve ever gotten. I’mveryvery sorry. Now will I get to use it tonight?”

She crossed her arms with a huff, and she said, “Only because I like you, for whatever reason.”

I laughed, kissing her cheek. “I’m just proud to get to show off that I have you.”

She broke out into a playful smile my way. “You are rather… cute, in that way.”

I looked down, leaning in and resting my elbows on my knees, looking at our legs pressed together. “I know we’ve been pretending this isn’t a thing, but… you know this program only goes on for so long.”

She paused, looking at me with wide eyes, green eye glinting brighter. “Lydia… please tell me you’re not trying to call this offrightafter having talked to my friend about our sex life.”

“I’m notcalling offanything. It’s just…” I slumped backwards, against the plush back of the couch. Ella’s posture was rigid next to me, holding herself small. “What happens? To us? Then? I care for you, Ella. I told you I’m not good at casual, and it seems like I meant it. But… LA’s a long way away.”

She softened, slowly, her shoulders sinking, gaze falling to the floor. “I know,” she said, quietly. “A very long way away. And I imagine you’d miss all the sunshine and beaches if you spent too much time in London.”

“Clara already said she’d come visit me in LA,” I said, going for a light tone. “To try all the noodle places, and also to discover what sunshine was. You should come too. You know—for the noodles.”

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