Page 41 of The Forbidden Note

He keeps muttering tenderly in my ear and rubbing my hair, my back, my side until the panic shrinks to the size of my palm.

“Come on, tiger. Come back to me.”

His tenderness pierces the fog and I slide back to reality in a slow descent.

For a moment, I hold him, anchoring myself in the hardness of his body. Reacquainting myself with reality through the parts of him I can feel, touch and smell.

His skin is hot.

His heartbeat is a steady rhythm.

His unique smell of leather and sandalwood fills my nose.

Warm hands round over my shoulders and down my back. “You okay now?”

“Y-yeah,” I mutter. My breathing evens out and I blink rapidly, stripped raw by a moment I wish he hadn’t witnessed.

It’s impossible to see his face in the casket. There are no openings to allow light, and yet I can feel his energy radiating in my direction. It’s different than his usual arrogance. Softer. Concerned.

“I…” I lick my lips, unsure of what to say. “I don’t like small spaces.”

“I can see that.” There’s a hint of laughter. An ease that makes my shoulders relax.

“How are you not freaking out?” I croak, my heart still beating fast. “We… we could be buried alive.”

His chuckle vibrates through his body and mine.

“You think this is funny?”

“I think you almost gave me a heart attack.” He pushes my hair away from my face.

I’m not sure how he did that so effortlessly in the dark.

“That’s weird.” There’s a note of thoughtfulness in his voice.

“What?”

“You always seem so strong.”

“Everyone looks strong from a distance.”

He’s quiet. “What do I look like from a distance?”

Like a bad decision.

Like an anxious dream.

Like a wall that I can’t ever break down.

“Like a student,” I say finally.

He scoffs, but it’s not as angry as usual.

“You better now?”

I nod and try to ease away from him. “You can let me go.”

There’s a beat where he doesn’t move and I wonder if he’ll keep holding me. I wonder if I’ll have the strength to push him away.

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