Holding him is like trying to wrap my arms around a chasm that stretches to the ends of the earth. I want to wander in his darkness until I’ve seen every inch, but every time I turn a corner, I enter a new maze. More to discover than I have hours in a day.
The sheet’s pulled down to Kole’s waist, and as he rubs his hand up my side, he teases the line where it rests over my own. These quiet moments with him feel so peaceful. I don’t know what to make of them.
“What kind of story do you want to hear?”
I twist so I’m cradled against him, with my head resting in the nook of his arm.
When I said I wanted a story, I expected him to shoot my request down, so now I have to decide what I’m actually asking for.
Kole stays facing the dark ceiling, even as his hands don’t leave my skin. The glow of the moon sharpens the ridges on his strong jawline, and I’d like to take a walk through his mind to read what he’s thinking.
Reaching up, I trace my finger over the scar that cuts along his cheekbone. “Tell me about this.”
Finally, Kole angles his face to look down at me. For a moment, I keep my fingers on his cheek, holding his scar like I can help him carry the burden of it, if even just for this moment.
Kole reaches up to take my wrist, pulling my hand down between us.
“Does your scar have anything to do with why you said you and Declan shouldn’t have gotten past the second trial?”
I assume anything bad enough to keep them out of Sigma House must be pretty terrible, given the things they condone between those walls. And it’s clear the scar on Kole’s face tells a story.
Kole rolls to his side, facing me, cupping my cheek with one of his hands. “Yes and no.”
“Will you tell me?”
His dark gaze holds mine for a moment. Hesitation churns in his eyes.
While he’s managed to carve straight to my core, I’m still on his surface, fighting for every little glimpse he’ll give.
Kole watches me, and when it’s not an immediate no, I’m hopeful that I’ll get one more hint of a man I can barely wrap my head around.
His fingers play in my hair. “It’s a long story.”
“I have time.” I press my naked body flush with his, knowing I’m using it against him but unable to help it.
I love how he skates his arm around my waist to pull me tighter. How he holds me like I can never be close enough. How our bodies might as well be a singular heartbeating in this room, and I don’t think one could survive without the other anymore.
“Please,” I whisper, tracing his jaw with my fingers, watching the cold wall in his gaze crumble away.
“Okay.” Kole sighs, brushing my hair from my eyes.
I wait while he collects his thoughts. Or maybe he’s buried certain memories so deep he has to dig them out. Because there’s a moment of silence before he finally breaks it.
“My father was Sigma Sin,” Kole says, his expression blank and emotionless. “And his father. And his father… You get the idea.”
I do.
That’s how fraternities like Sigma House function. Most of the members are legacies who go on to run towns like Bristal. They’re an institution, advancing the next generation and slowly spreading their influence like a plague.
It’s one of the reasons I never trusted the members of Sigma House. There are always deals being made behind closed doors. Which makes me wonder how Kole is a part of this. He doesn’t strike me as someone who cares about the kind of power men from Sigma House usually aim for.
“Well, my dad was an abusive fucker. Beat the shit out of my mom weekly. Sometimes, it would spill over to me, but most of the time, he’d focus his attention on her. And it wasn’t just smacking her around. He’d pull out his belts and cords; one time, it was a bat. I managed to get between them that night, and it hurt like fucking hell.”
“That’s terrible.” Tears sting my eyes as I consider the violence Kole must have been subjected to at such a young age.
“Wasn’t fun.” He clenches his jaw. “But I wasn’t often caught in the middle. I was my father’s legacy, and if anything was more important than his money, it was that. He couldn’t risk destroying it.”
Kole doesn’t blink. He doesn’t show an ounce of hesitation or pain as he tells me his story.