Page 7 of Eternal

“Need you?” I laugh because it’s ridiculous for him to even think that. “The only thing I could ever need from you is for karma to finally catch up. Then yes, I’d like a front-row seat to the universe kicking your ass.”

Declan steps closer, tipping my chin up with his thumb. “Laugh it off all you want. You’re going to need something from me soon, whether you like it or not. And no matter how much you hate me, you’ll accept that I’m the only one who will be able to give it to you.”

“What could I possibly need from you?”

“You’ll see.” He drags his teeth over his lower lip as he scans me over; a tendril of his dark hair falls just over his eyebrow. “Let me know when you’ve had a chance to talk to your father. Because next time we have this conversation, you’ll thank me for doing my research before walking into this.”

I don’t know what Declan is talking about, and I don’t care. I’ve never wanted anything from him in my life, and I’m not starting now.

“Screw you, Declan.” I glare. “I’d trust Satan himself before I’d ever ask you for a favor.”

“We’ll see about that.” He taps my lower lip with his thumb. “Hate me if that’s easier. It might even make it more fun when you submit.”

I shove him off me. “And here I thought I was the one who was losing my mind. Goodnight, Declan. Burn in hell.”

“See you there.”

3

Make You Regret It

Teal

My head is ina fog when I wake up, and I make a note on my phone to call Dr. Parish and ask about my medication. The last time I saw him, he said he adjusted the dose, and it was supposed to temper the negative reactions I was having. But if last night is any indication, it’s not working fast enough.

I close my eyes and try to fall back into my dream. With the medicated buzz wearing off, I’m exhausted, but my mind refuses to settle. I pinch the bridge of my nose as I try to make sense of the past twenty-four hours.

I’ve been struggling with reality again, so it takes a moment to sort through what from last night was real and what was a dream.

Did I leave the dorm after my roommates went to bed? Did I imagine my conversation with Declan? Was I sleeping all along?

I reach up to my ear and feel for the earbud still lodged inside. The music stopped playing at some point in the night, and my ear aches where it’s been pressing against the cartilage. I find the second one in my pocket, the spot I tucked it into when I grabbed it back from Declan.

Last nightwasreal.

I cringe, even if it should probably be a relief.

At least these pills aren’t making me hallucinate like the last ones did. Or worse, the ones that turned my mind to Swiss cheese and made me feel like I was having out-of-body experiences.

One pill and I couldn’t see straight.

I was floating. Seeing things.

I could barely stay awake, and every time I closed my eyes, my soul left my body.

At first, it was nice to disconnect because being tied here is a constant struggle. But when I vocalized my reactions to Dr. Parish, he said the medication wouldn’t be doing that if I actually had bipolar disorder. They’d made a mistake.

They got itwrong.

Like I’m a fucking science experiment.

One of these days, I’ll stop taking everything. I’ll reset my brain and subject myself to Darwinism. I’ve been medicated for so many years that I don’t even know if I’m depressed anymore or if the pills are keeping me like this. The only reason I haven’t is because of my constant fearthat the chemicals in my head might be worse than what they prescribe me.

Last night is proof my mind can’t be trusted.

I know couples sneak out around campus in the middle of the night to fuck in desolate corners, and I wandered around looking for it. I might have told Declan it was a coincidence I stumbled upon that couple, but it wasn’t. They’re regulars to that particular spot, and I needed to see it. I needed the reminder that if other people can feel things, then it must be possible.

I rub my eyes with the heel of my hands. My cheeks heat with the thought of Declan sneaking up behind me.