Page 87 of Hard To Leave

He shifted in his seat. It was obvious that he still didn’t like talking about it. “It took a while. You have to give it time.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “It wasn’t until I met the right woman that I realized how wrong Emily was for me.”

My head was so screwed up I didn’t know what to think. I didn’t know where I belonged anymore. It was as if my head and my heart were fighting against each other.

My life was here in Manhattan, but my heart was in South Carolina. I couldn’t focus on my work because I was too busy drowning in my own self-pity to give a shit about anything else.

This wasn’t all just about Chloe, either. I always wondered who Tanner’s father was, and if he might find his way back into his life. I’d always suspected that she was holding something back, but it didn’t stop me from falling in love with both of them. It didn’t matter now because neither one of them would be mine.

How did I fight for something that didn’t even belong to me?

Brad leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees. “I get it, man; you know I do.” He stopped as if the memory of all he went through with Emily still pained him. “She never told you who Tanner’s father was. She lied to you, and you feel like you can’t trust her. It makes you wonder what other secrets she has kept from you.” He paused briefly. “But if she’s the one, then fight for her. Trust me, don’t walk away, because no matter how hard it gets, ending up with your soul mate is so fucking worth it.”

I worked my hands around the back of my neck, trying to release the ball of tension building at the top of my spine. “How do I compete with a fucking country superstar?”

“Who says you have to?”

“Come on, Brad, he’s Tanner’s father. Plus, according to the gossip sites, they are already planning their wedding and trying for baby number two, and I don’t even have an equity stake in baby number one,” I said sarcastically.

Brad whistled, shaking his head. “Well, then it must be true if you read it on the internet or saw it in theEnquirer. No fake news there, now, is there?”

I folded my hands under my chin. “I don’t know what to believe.”

“Of course, you don’t. You bolted without even hearing her out. You haven’t listened to her messages. Why don’t you give her a chance to explain?”

“I’m pissed off; that’s why!” I yelled.

“As pissed as you are at Chloe, you can’t hold that against Tanner. It’s not his fault. He didn’t ask for any of this.”

I slammed my hands down on my desk so hard my walls shook. “You don’t think I fucking know that?” I felt my anger rise with each breath I took. “I love that kid as if he were my own, but he’s not, and now he never fucking will be.”

“He may not be your kid, but he still cares about you. He doesn’t give a shit if you’re his mom’s boyfriend, boss, or the damned mailman. He loves you, and he’s probably more confused now than ever. He needs you, Jack. Don’t turn your back on him because you’re hurt and wounded. That just makes you a selfish prick and that little boy deserves better.”

My body sank back in my chair feeling defeated. He was right. Tanner didn’t ask for any of this. I blew out a deep breath while looking up at the ceiling. “I’m such an asshole.”

“You’re not an asshole. You’re human, and you’re hurting right now. And if I know you at all, you’re probably going batshit crazy, creating all these ideas in your head without knowing all the facts. Get your head out of your ass and give her a chance to explain. Stop being a fucking pussy and call her.”

I leaned back and folded my hands behind my head. “Ah, there he is, my asshole friend. I was starting to wonder where you were. I was actually getting worried with you spewing all this sentimental shit.”

“You’re right. I’m an asshole.” He smirked. “You know what they say…birds of a feather flock together.”

I picked up my staple puller and chucked it at his head. He ducked in time and laughed as it sailed right over the top of him. “That all you got, tough guy?”

“Fuck you!” I laughed, and it felt good.

Brad gestured to the bag and stood up. He looked at his watch. “I gotta run. Make sure you eat this.”

“Hey, Brad.” He stopped on his way out the door to look at me. “I’m really happy for you.”

“Thanks. I appreciate it. You know what they say, in the end, everything will be all right. So, if everything’s not all right, it isn’t the end. Get it?”

“I’m glad you stopped by. Give my best to Lexi.”

He nodded. “Seriously, put something in your stomach and clear your head. Trust me, you’ll feel better once you take a step back and regroup and think things over.”

I decided at that moment to unwrap my sandwich and take a bite. As much as I hated to admit it, he was right. I needed to face this shit head-on and deal in fact, not fiction. After a couple bites, I started to feel the anger leave my body and my thoughts began to settle. It was time to man-up and head down to the Carolinas.

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