Page 39 of Fumbled Beginning

JP

“I screwed up, Mike,”I said to my brother as I walked to the window and peeked outside.

“So, what else is new?” I could tell from the traffic noises in the background that he was on his way to my niece’s soccer game. Mike was three years older than me, married to a great girl, and had an adorable kid. I was envious of my older brother for many things, but mainly that he had his shit together.

I felt my jaw tic. “You could be a little more empathetic, bro.”

“Why don’t you just tell me what you did.”

I gave my hair a nervous tug. I was going to regret this; I just knew it. “I slept with Maverick’s sister.”

“You did what?” It sounded like he was choking on his coffee. “What the hell were you thinking?”

I knew calling him was a bad idea, but it wasn’t like I had any other options.

“Trust me, you don’t want to know.” I turned away from the window and walked back over to the bed to lie down. I might have felt guilty for what happened last night, but I sure as hell didn’t regret it. “Things just kind of happened,” I tried to explain. In reality, it felt like a long time coming. The plan was to have a nice dinner and get to know each other better, but when things heated up and she gave me an opening, I jumped right in. There was no way I could have slowed down; I had no control when it came to that woman.

“Come on, JP. I know you’ve had a few concussions, but your brain isn’t that bad yet. You had to know this was a bad idea.”

I adjusted a few pillows behind my back so I could sit up straighter. “It didn’t feel like a bad idea.”

“Are you going to tell him?”

My stomach muscles clenched at the thought of my friend finding out. I felt guilty, dirty, and downright fucking awful. Would he hate me? Kick my ass? Cut me off? Any of those were a possibility.

“I should, I just don’t know what to say to him,” I said, running a hand through my hair. I felt myself getting defensive. I wasn’t usually one to shy away from anything, but Maverick was important to me, and the last thing I wanted to do was ruin our friendship over this.

“Let’s back up for a second.” He lowered his voice while I shifted to the side. “Is there more going on here? Do you have feelings for her?”

My mind went back to last night, with how we worked through our physical feelings, and then this morning when we did it again. When she left, I was feeling disappointed. I wanted more. More of her time, her laugh, her kisses. I wasn’t that guy, but if I was being honest with myself, my feelings for Rylee ran much deeper than I cared to admit.

I swallowed hard. “I care for her, but what if things don’t work out?” There were a million reasons why we shouldn’t be together, and there was a really big chance I’d screw up somehow. Then what?

“I need to say something, and I don’t want you to take this the wrong way.”

My hands tightened around the phone while I braced myself.

“Being monogamous isn’t your thing. It hasn’t been for a while, and Rylee isn’t some random woman you test things out with. This is your best friend’s sister, so you better make damn sure you know what you want. Shouldn’t all your energy be on football, considering you only have a couple more years left in the league?”

There was a lot to unpack from what he just said. He had some valid points, but I was trusting my instincts. There was nothing about Rylee that felt wrong. In fact, I couldn’t remember the last time something felt so right.

“Am I supposed to let bad timing stop me from being with someone I want to be with?”

“I’m not saying that at all, but if you want to be with her, then you have to tell him.”

I flopped my head back on my pillow and stared at the ceiling. “I know, and I will. I just need to find the right time and figure out what to say.”

“The sooner the better.” He sighed into the phone. “Listen, I hate to cut things off here, but we just pulled into the parking lot. Brenna’s game is about to start.”

I glanced at the clock and hopped off the bed. “You better get a move on it. Tell her I said good luck.”

“I’ll call you later tonight so we can revisit this conversation.”

“I can’t wait,” I said, walking into my closet to grab a pair of sneakers. I needed to get a good run in before it got too hot.

Mike laughed. “You better answer when I call, because we are not done, brother.”

“Don’t you do enough interrogating during your day job? Are you not pulling enough people over for broken taillights, Deputy Watson?”

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