Page 26 of Lovesick Titan

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“Yes.”

“Shit, man, that’s…”

“Awful? Disgusting?”

“Not like you.”

Danny looked up and Andre’s repulsion might have been coated in pity, but it didn’t make anything better. “But it is like me. I wanted to hurt someone, Andre. Like what Thanatos did to me.Iwanted to be theone in control, the one pulling someone else’s strings.God…I’m just like him.”

“You’re not—”

“But Iam.” Danny clenched his fists again, uncaring to how much it hurt. “And Thanatos knew it. He knew he’d break me. And he did. He got exactly what he wanted when I killed him. He knew I’d end up bitter and angry and even worse than he was.”

“Danny, Thanatos was crazy—”

“And it’s somehow better that I’m not?” Danny snapped.

But Andre didn’t flinch or back down at yet again being cut off. “No, Danny. It’s awful, what you were going to do. It’s really awful. But you know that. And you stopped yourself before going through with it. It doesn’t make things better, it doesn’t make it okay, but it’s a start. You know you’ve been the bad guy and you hate yourself for it. You’ve been hating yourself this whole time. You ever stop to think that maybe the reason you’ve been so wrecked lately isbecauseyou’re acting out of character?”

Danny opened his mouth to speak but no words formed. He’d been feeling fractured and torn apart for months, and all he’d done since then was pull at his seams that much harder.

“Do you love Cho? Or do you just feel guilty for using him?”

Gentle hands touched Danny’s closed fists and he blinked at how close Andre was, his grey eyes looking up at Danny in concern. Slowly, Danny let his fists loosen. “Everything’s different now. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with himback. But I…did. Ido. I love him. What am I supposed to do now, Andre? I have to tell him the truth.”

Andre’s face scrunched in sympathy. “Okay. But if you love him, then you need to tell him that too. It’s not gonna be easy for him to hear this. You gotta put it the right way. But I think once you come clean, you’ll finally start feeling like yourself again. And then, I promise, things will get easier. You’ll see.” He smiled encouragingly. “Now come on, screw Ludgate for the rest of the morning. Let’s practice what you’re gonna say to Cho. Then you can go talk to him.”

Danny laughed in relief at how understanding his friend was being. “Thank you. You’re right. I don’t want to lose him. I love him.”

He loved Cho—Mal—and he was going to tell him. He was going to make this right.

R

Mal felt like he was slowly suffocating until he exited the precinct and breathed the outside air. He covered the few blocks to the alley where he’d parked his bike so quickly, he barely noticed his surroundings. Shaking and too hot and fighting for breath, he reared back and kicked his bike over with a crash.

He’d been conned. Duped. Taken for a fool. And he’d practically handed himself over on a platter, he’d been so easy to manipulate. All this time Mal had been so certain that Danny was some untouchablegoodin the world. But he was just like everybody else.

No one used Malcolm Cho. No one did this to him. No one made himfeellike…

With a final sharp intake of breath, Mal cracked his neck to the side and let his fists relax. He picked up his bike, replaced the police hat for his helmet, and drove out of the alley, leaving everything about the past few weeks behind him.

He was going to be ready the next time Zeus came to see him, and he was going to make him pay.

Chapter6

Danny once again smoothed down his sweater. If it was a real work day, he would have worn a button down underneath it, but today there was just a tank top to protect him from the occasional itch of the fabric. The V showed off a bit of skin that he felt oddly self-conscious about right now.

He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his bomber jacket to calm his nerves. On the way over, he’d messaged Mal.You home?

At the moment.

Can we talk?

I’ll be here.

It was almost too easy. Danny knew it was Mal’s true nature shining through, his goodness and desire to be cared for that Danny had thrown back in his face, but this was his chance. He’d practiced with Andre how to explain himself in a dozen different ways that would hopefully soften the blow and make it clear that Danny did care about Mal. He just hoped the words he chose would be enough.

The walk to Mal’s apartment was over much faster than yesterday, even though Danny had lightning jumped to the same spot and walked the same few blocks. He didn’t run into anyone on the streets this time, and no one was in the hallways of the apartment building when he entered.