Page 94 of The Alpha's Second Chance Mate

“You are a good father,” I said quietly. “Everything is okay. I promise.”

Ashton’s ears twitched, and he tilted his head his head to the side.

Cole’s wolf dipped its head and licked my hand. He was the wolf, and the wolf was him, but they still had somewhat differing personalities. Right now, after how sullen and pissy Cole had been, I liked his wolf better.

Cole chuffed at Ashton, some sort of wolf language I didn’t understand, and the two sprinted off toward the woods together. The first nighttime run together. Standing there, arms crossed over my chest, I watched them until they vanished into the woods.

“Cole’s upset,” I said, keeping my eyes on the forest.

“Yeah,” Trent said, drawing the word out in a regretful tone. “It came out of him in waves. All that frustration, sadness, and anger. It was powerful enough that I could almost taste it. Avery, I tried. I really did. I had Ashton doing special breathing and relaxation exercises I learned in the military. I even tried to get him to lie down and rest, hoping it would slow the change. I knew Cole wanted to be here for it. I thought we had at least until the full moon.”

“That’s what Cole said.”

A wolf howled in the distance. A moment later, another answered it in almost the same pitch. All I could do was hope that Cole could put aside his sadness and regret and enjoy thismoment with his son. Ashton deserved to enjoy this night, even if Cole was heartbroken.

22

COLE

When I woke the next morning, the exhaustion almost crushed me. Not only the physical exhaustion of waking up so early and going on a run in the middle of the night, but the emotional exhaustion. It was like a battering ram slamming into me over and over again.

Last night, I’d had dreams of getting here in time, of helping Ashton get through his shift. Wonderful, perfect dreams. Instead, I was left with the reality.

I was an absent father.

Ever since I found out I had a son, I could think of nothing but everything I’d missed. Birthdays, playing the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny, watching his face the first time he saw the ocean—I’d missed it all. There was no chance for a redo. The prospect of Avery and Ashton returning, and my son being so close to his first shift, had filled me with excitement. There was at least one more huge moment, one more milestone, I could be there for. Except, I’d been asleep in a ritzy hotel in Atlanta instead of here with my boy when he needed me.

Regardless of what Avery or Ashton said about it, that single failure would haunt me for the rest of my life. If I couldn’t be counted on to be there for the big moments, especially when we now lived in the same town, how the fuck could they count on me for anything?

Once again, pack business got in the way of me living my life the way I wanted. If not for the bullshit my father had gotten us into, I never would have had to go to Atlanta. Every time I thought life was looking up, something with the pack came swooping in to shatter everything. Even now, I couldn’t simply lie here and stew about it. I had to get up and handle more pack issues.

Slinging the cover of the sleeping bag off, I got up, scowling as I got dressed. Out in the kitchen, I heard the muffled sounds of Ashton and Avery’s voices. Inhaling deeply, I tried to calm my mind. I couldn’t keep exposing them to my irritation. Neither of them had done anything wrong, yet I couldn’t stop myself for some reason. I felt like I was on a razor’s edge all the time, and things kept pushing me over.

When Ashton and I got back from our run the night before, Avery had already gone to bed. Trent had pulled me aside to talk while Ash went to sleep.

“Are you good, bro?”

“I’m fine,” I grunted, and tried to throw his arm off.

But Trent was strong. Not as strong as me, but strong enough to retain a hold on my shirt. He yanked me back, almost shaking me.

“You need to chill. I can feel the negativity coming off you in waves. Ashton will, too.”

“How?” I hissed, trying to keep my voice low but feeling miserable. “How the fuck do I chill, Trent?” My eyes burned. “I wasn’t here. Youwere. I love you like a brother, but it should have been me.”

“I get that,” he said. “I really do, but there’s more going on here. That kid needs a dad, and Avery needs a man to take care of her. I know you want to do both of those things, but you’ve got to get over the past first. Beating yourself up over all the stuff that’s already happened isn’t going to do anyone any favors. You have to live for now.”

“And I missed this moment now, Trent,” I said. “Even now, I’m fucking up. Everything about Harbor Mills is rubbing me the wrong way. It ruined my life before, and it’s trying to ruin it now. I fucking wish I never came back. If not for Ashton and Avery, I’d say let’s hit the goddamn road.”

“We can’t do that, Cole. You came back. You took up the responsibility. People are looking to you for guidance and leadership. You know we can’t pick up stakes and go.”

“Yeah,” I grumbled, bitterness seeping deeper into my soul. “I’m going to bed.”

Now, as I stood in the guest room, I tried my best to take his words to heart. In the cold light of day, I saw what a prick I’d been yesterday. Hell, I’d toldAvery to spoil herself, and then when she did, I’d acted all hurt and anxious, worrying about money. What the fuck was wrong with me?

Once I thought I had myself under control, I went to the kitchen, where Avery was finishing up what looked like a monster breakfast: bacon, sausage, gravy, homemade biscuits, scrambled eggs, hash browns, and a bowl of fruit.

I eyed the spread. “Wow. When did you wake up to do all this?”

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