Page 13 of Don Caselli

My phone was still sitting on the desk when I sat down and powered on my monitors. I never slept with my phone in the same room as me. People woke up tired because they kept their phones in their faces right before bed. The minute they couldn’t sleep, they would turn over and get on their phones until sleep eventually found them.

I checked a few emails while going over what Johnathan, the family’s accountant, had to say before I went on and checked other shit that I was involved with. Corleon sent me a few leads for some shit we were working on with Goon and his brother. Once I looked into what he wanted and what they were trying to do, I could do my part before passing the ball back his way.

My other monitor chimed, and I turned my head and looked at the notification from YouTube from Navy. I didn’t know how often she posted or what her schedule was. I knew from the other night watching her videos, I wanted to see more of her, so I subscribed to her channel. The email that I was about to respond to that Kora sent me took the back seat as my chair rolled over toward that monitor and I clicked the notification that took me to her newest video.

It was her morning routine in her very regular Brooklyn apartment. This wasn’t some sky rise apartment with neutrals everywhere, and the perfect setup. Her home was lived in and curated to display her personality and style. There was something in every nook and cranny of what I could see. Behind her there was a gallery wall with albums, black art pieces, and motivational saying. The slouch gray couch behind her had different pillows and throw blankets tossed across it.

Her collection of vinyl spilled behind the stand that the vinyl player sat on. The camera angle switched as she walked across her living room into the small kitchen and prepared a homemade meal. No words were spoken, just a jazz beat over all the things she was currently doing.

I watched as she stood in front of the mirror in one clip and clapped her hands, and the edit switched her from her pajamas into an oversized shirt, jean shorts and a pair of sneakers. Her braids were pulled up, and she decided between two bags and a pair of sunglasses.

She kissed her fingers, and the short vlog ended, and the comments piled in. Some were requesting longer videos, while others wanted to know the details of her outfit and some of her pictures that were behind her.

I exited out of her video, pushing her to the back of my head and finally checking my phone. Kennedy’s name was at the top of my text messages. The three question marks she sent let me know she expected me to answer the phone.

This was the shit that had me second guessing if she was worth all of this. When she never responded to my text messages, I never gave her shit for it. I sat back and played it cool and waited for her to respond.

When I gave her a taste of her own medicine, then I was met with a bunch of fucking question marks and missed calls like I was her damn man. While the goal was to become her man, I wasn’t that now, and she needed to chill the fuck out. The situation was sensitive, and I needed to make sure that I wanted to cause the tension between me and my brother for her. Menace wasn’t forgiving, so if you were gonna burn a bridge with him, you needed to know how to swim.

I finished on my computers before heading into the main area, turning the TV on for some background noise to break up the silence. As I made a light breakfast, I listened to the news. Stevie invited us over for a brunch before she had the baby. She was due at any moment, and she still wanted to have us over and host.

While Menace was cool seeing us twice a year, it was Stevie who made sure we got together more often. I’ve had to see mybrother’s hand rubbing up close way too often because of his new wife. After the train wreck of a baby shower, I think she wanted to just be calm and cool before having the baby.

“The co-owner of the New York Sonics is making headlines again. This time, it’s all about love. He and his fiancée, Kennedy Watkins, are officially tying the knot this summer in what’s expected to be a stunning ceremony in Lake Como. We wish the happy couple all the best.Coming up next, the Red Hook serial killer has resurfaced. Find out where and what authorities are saying. Right after the break.”

The water slid from my mouth onto my chest as I stood frozen with the fridge door opened. The chiming noise signaling me to close it did nothing. The wordsengagedrang through my head as I watched the engagement photos appear on the screen at the same time the reporter wished them the best.

My fucking chest was on fire as I watched the commercials come on, and I still hadn’t moved. Not once did she mention she was engaged or even fucking dating somebody. While she was all in my business and accusing me of fucking with so many bitches, she was the one that should have been questioned.

I never asked because I took her word and now, she was getting married to a nigga who was old enough to be her father and had sexual assault accusations. It wasn’t that long ago that he was in the media because some chick that he used to date, that was young, said that he sexually assaulted her, and was verbally abusive.

This whole time I had been patient with her because I never wanted her to feel like I was rushing. I also didn’t want to jump into anything with her because I wanted to know that she was serious. Every time we got around each other, she always joked about me marrying her and taking her off the market.

Whole time her ass had been engaged and never told me. I allowed Kennedy to make the moves because I wanted hercomfortable and I wasn’t the kind of nigga who needed to rush anybody into anything.

I’ve always believed that things would happen the way they were supposed to. There was no reason for me to rush into anything. I was over here being a gentleman, and she wanted the fucking sexual abuser.

I tossed the glass into the sink, pissed. Neither my phone ringing nor the fact that the ringing in my ear was louder than normal mattered. Leaning against the counter, my heart fucking hurt. I could deal with her not wanting to be together.

I’m not some nigga who couldn’t be told no.

It was the fact that she sat in my face and lied to me. All she had to do was be honest, and she lied to me. Each time I joked and said she had a nigga she was hiding, she could have been honest and told me she was fucking grandpa.

Every single fucking time, she lied and told me that she was single and focused on herself. I looked at the mess I had made in the sink and went to my room to get dressed. I needed to get out this fucking house.

It was amazing that my TV was still on the wall after hearing that shit. Since I was a child, I had always had a bad temper. Whenever I was angry and past that point, it was best to keep to myself. That was the reason that I ended up moving out.

As I became older, and damn near was the same height and weight as Menace, I challenged him more. One night I became upset for something stupid, and he calmly told me to take a walk. When I was past that point, all I saw was red and didn’t give a fuck what anybody had to say. I challenged my brother, and he put me on my ass.

I could see the way he kept giving me warnings to get out of his space. Allowing me the chance to change my mind because he didn’t want to put his hands on me. He rubbed his handstogether until I charged at him, and he pulled his pants up and put me on my neck.

When it was all said and done, he never challenged me or puffed his chest out to show he was badder. He leaned over me and told me to get the fuck out of his house. I didn’t understand why at nineteen that I would challenge him. Why did I think I could take him when the man had trained for hours every day?

Living between Kora and Zoya wasn’t ideal, either. They both lived a certain way, and neither of them agreed on what I had done. Menace cut us all off for two months because of that shit. He didn’t speak to none of us, and even when we tried to visit him, we were met with silence.

As I’ve become older, I realized that it was the ultimate disrespect to challenge him. A man who was so complex and caring. He had his own way, but I knew he loved and cared about me. Putting my hands up to harm him was disrespect in his eyes, and though we have worked past it, I knew it was something that was still in the back of his head, because it was in mine.

Soon as Ipulled up to Menace’s house, I stopped for security and put the code in while guards walked around my car.

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