Page 21 of Joy Guardian

It didn’t help my composure that when I finally saw her at dinner, she seemed to be quieter than usual. Worry racked me.

What if she’d been hurt?

I raked my gaze over her body, searching for any signs of abuse and getting ready to burn this entire city to the ground if I found any.

“What are you looking at?” she asked, adjusting her braids over her naked breasts.

I forced my fists to unclench and cleared a growl out of my throat.

“Did you enjoy your midnight meal?” I asked with as normal a voice as I could master, waiting and dreading to hear her answer.

She nodded, but her smile flickered with uncertainty.

“It wasn’t bad. They gave me some wine to relax.”

“Wine? But it makes humans sick. How are you feeling?” I leaned closer to see her face.

Her smile grew wider. She playfully shoved against my chest, leaving her hand lingering on my skin.

“It was just one glass, Kurai. I’m a grown woman and can handle some alcohol. It just took the edge off a little, made me less nervous about the whole thing. Lady Uryami seemed to like it too. At least she didn’t run away screaming like that councilor did the first time they tried to connect me to someone.”

I breathed slowly, counting to five, then to ten, to keep my anger under control. I had no right to feel angry. Ciana wasn’t mine and never could be. She belonged to the queen. All her emotions were the property of the Royal Court. She didn’t even have a right to gift me a single smile because all her smiles also belonged to the queen—not to me and no longer to her.

She realized it too, because I saw my thoughts and my worries reflect in her dark, soulful eyes.

“You know, maybe you’re right.” She sighed deeply. “Maybe it is time for me to consider my future. Only I fear it's already too late because I don’t think I have any control over it anymore.”

It was hard, so hard to leave her that night. She seemed contemplative, but I sensed she didn’t want to be alone. I wanted to hold her, and I had a feeling she would’ve liked that. After all, she was the one who believed in the healing power of hugs. But the Keepers appeared to be hovering exceptionally close to us this time. They kept darting probing glances at me, making me feel like I’d overstayed my welcome.

Still, I stayed as long as I could, until Ciana’s eyes glossed over with exhaustion, and she hid a yawn behind her hand.

With my hands on her shoulders, I bid her good day while bending down intentionally to bring our faces closer. Like every night for the past two weeks, she rose on her tiptoes and kissed me on my cheek.

The gesture remained as wrong as it had ever been between a Joy Guardian and a Joy Vessel. But I was looking forward to her kiss every morning now, and I wouldn’t leave without it.

The sensation of her warm, gentle lips lingered on my skin as I walked back to my room at the palace, and I wished I knew how to preserve it forever.

Six guards waited at the door to my room.

One of them stepped forward. “Greetings, Joy Guardian Kurai. The Royal Council is requesting your presence.”

It’d been weeks since my last meeting with the council. To my knowledge, the Watchers had managed to keep our mission a secret. There was no reason for me to worry. Still, my heart leaped in my chest, making it hard to keep calm.

“What is it all about?” I asked.

There were no council meetings scheduled for this hour, I was certain of that. The nobles of the royal court, including many council members, had just left thesarai, buzzing with the intoxicated humans’ pleasure.

“Please, follow us.” The guard gestured down the corridor to the main staircase of the palace while two others took their place on either side of me. The rest of the guards stepped behind me, as if expecting me to flee.

This didn’t look like an invitation but an order, and I wondered if I should comply or if the time had come for me to act.

I laced my fingers in front of my chest. “It’s time for my morning meditation. So unless it’s?—”

“It’s an order,” the leader of the guards barked. “We’re to bring you over either dead or alive. Which one will be your choice?”

He drew his sword, and I chose to live just a little bit longer.

“All right, lead the way,” I conceded.

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