“Oh, by the way, Leo is coming.”

My face falls. “Alissa, why? He doesn't even know Paige!”

“Oliver said it was fine! I’m trying to get him out of the house.” Alissa comes further into my room and shuts the door. “Our dad had a scare the other day, and it really rattled him. He needs to get out of the house and mingle.”

I nod in understanding. “How’s your dad? And how are you doing with all of this?” Alissa is a strong girl—mentally and physically—but I know all this stuff with her family has shaken her up, and it has been a minute since I checked in on her.

“I’m okay. It’s shit being over here sometimes, but I know if I went back to England, my parents would shout at me to go follow my dreams.”

“You know I’m always here if you need anything, and—”

“Ella, I know that. Anyone who knows you knows that about you.” She grabs my hand in hers. “What I need from you tonight is to make Leo feel included. I can only do so much.”

“Well, he knows Grant.” I know they’ve gone out a few times. Grant always asks me if it’s okay they hang out. It makes me laugh that he feels like he has to ask permission, but I always tell him it's fine. “But I’ll be nice. For you.”

“That’s all I ask, Ells.” She gets up from my bed and leaves my room.

The bed you fucked her brother on…

That isnotwhat I want to think about right now, so I grab my purse and head out, only to run into Leo exiting his bedroom as well. He does a quick once-over, and my body becomes all too aware of his eyes on me, which pisses me off.

“You look…” I struggle to find a word nice enough to say what I want to say. “Clean.”

He cocks his head at me, a stupid expression on his face. “You too.”

And I’m not lying. He’s wearing black dress pants, a white button up, a tie, and his sleeves are rolled up. Why the fuck does he always do that?

I head into the living room to find Alissa standing by the door, typing something on her phone. She looks up when she hears my heels click toward her.

“Ready?”

“Let’s go,” I say as we leave the apartment.

As the three ofus walk into the restaurant and I see Grant and Hads at the table, my mood is immediately lifted.

It’s not that I’m upset about all the happiness floating in the air for Paige and Oliver; I just feel weird and off for some reason.

I don’t hate being alone—that I don’t have a date to bring to things like these. I prefer it, actually. I think I’m worried the older I get, the more likely it is I’ll end up alone for the rest of my life.

I know I have time—realistically—but these feelings won’t go away. I haven't tried to date since I broke up with my ex-girlfriend, and I have no urge to put myself back out there. It all seems…exhausting, if I’m being honest. I’m tired of doing the whole get to know me thing, only for it to peter out at month three or four. It’s a vicious cycle that always ends with me being by myself.

Plus, nobody can match my energy. Some people have broken up with me because I’m too loud in public, because I like to sing at random times. Some people just can’t handle how much I am.

I can’t help it if I’m an extroverted person who likes karaoke. And more often than not, the person on the other side of the table bores me to death. I need someone interesting, someone who challenges me, and I have yet to find someone like that. I don't have time to date either. If this shit with my mom blowsup, I need to put all my focus on protecting my sister from her claws.

I go over to Hads as I shake myself out of those bad thoughts I don’t need to be having. Tonight is a night for celebrating my friends and an engagement—not for feeling shitty about the current state of my life.

“Hey, girl,” I say as I hug her. “Missed you.”

“I missed you too, babe.” Hads moves her gaze to Alissa. “Hi, Liss!”

Those two start to talk, and Grant and I lock eyes.

“Ells, did you know this place has karaoke tonight?” Grant asks me as he crushes me in a hug.

“I didn't.” I smile at him.

“Are you up for a duet?”