Page 47 of City of Love

I can practically hear Jade grinning. “It would be weird if you didn’t, babe. What’s he like? Can you see a lot of his pen pal self in him?”

“Yes and no,” I say. “It’s like…all the stuff I liked when I thought he was a girl, but now he’s handsome, too. And he’s sweet with me, but he’s pretty growly with everyone else—”

“Ilovethat,” Jade says with a sigh. “You’re his soft spot.”

I shrug, and I can feel my face reddening a little bit. “Maybe? I don’t know. The thing is, I really don’t think he feels that way about me.”

“Does it seem like a brother/sister relationship?”

“No,” I say slowly, drawing the word out and thinking. “Not quite. He calls me ‘sweetheart’ sometimes, and he’s physically affectionate. Not necessarily romantically, but definitely more than siblings.”

“Hmm,” Jade says. “Sort of on bosom friend level?”

I snort. “I don’t know what that means.”

“Think Frodo and Sam. Frodo kisses Sam on the forehead, right? At the end? But—”

“You know I don’t like those movies.”

“Yes, and it’s the one thing I don’t respect about you,” she says, and I grin as she goes on. “I don’t understand how you can loveHarry Potterand yet not enjoyLord of the Rings. But just listen,” she says before I can respond, because she undoubtedly knows I’m about to come to Harry’s defense. “Frodo and Sam are more than just friends. They’re not romantic, but their love for each other is so deep and so pure that it goes past mere friendship.”

“Okay,” I say. “I do actually see what you mean. I guess that could be it? It just…”

“Feels like more?”

“Yeah,” I say. “For me, anyway. I mean, I’ve been trying not to think about it. Because nothing could happen anyway. But I sort of get the feeling that he’s attracted to me but doesn’t want to be. Like I’ve caught him checking me out a few times, and then he seems annoyed.”

“Well, I think you should go for it,” Jade says. “Life is short.Carpe diemand all that.”

I smile. One of my favorite things about Jade is that I always know what she would say in any situation. I am not at all surprised that she thinks I should pursue Noel. Jade is fearless and bold—if she sees something she wants, she goes for it.

“Duly noted,” I say. “Now let me run a situation by you.” I’m anxious to get to this part of the conversation, because my body is still jittery with nerves and worry for Noel.

“Okay, shoot,” she says.

“If you overheard me planning to do something dumb and or dangerous, what would you do?”

“Hmm. How dumb and dangerous? Like, don’t-study-for-your-finals level dumb and dangerous? Or drink-and-drive level dumb and dangerous?”

“Drink-and-drive level,” I say.

“I would stop you,” Jade says, and I picture her shrugging matter-of-factly. “Before you got hurt or hurt anyone. You could go to jail, Lyd. And you would not do well in prison.”

I swallow, thinking again of dark Paris streets and cemeteries at night. “What if you were a scaredy cat and the prospect of going after me was really intimidating?”

“Hmm,” Jade says again. “I mean, I don’t think being scared should ever stop you from doing the right thing.”

Her words hit me hard and burrow deep into my chest, and in that second I make up my mind.

I will not let fear stop me from doing the right thing. And I will not let fear stop me from doing what I need to do.

Immediately Marcus pops into my mind—more specifically, reporting him—but I push that away. One thing at a time.

“You’re right,” I say, thinking hard. “Hey, Jade, I have to go.”

“Are you gonna tell me what this—”

“Yeah, I will, but another time,” I say quickly. “I have to run.”

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