Page 98 of Cosmic Soul

“Yes.” I couldn’t manage to say more than a single word, and Doctor Jalnin didn’t press. Often he sat with me in silence, giving my family a break.

“Have you seen Seth Harris?”

My jaw clenched, and I wrapped my tail around my leg. “No.”

I couldn’t. He was human. He reminded me of my Caleb. I glanced at the screen that never left my side. Edith had assured me, multiple times, that she had all of the information backed up, but a part of me worried somehow I would lose it and never hear his voice again.

“Prince Kalvoxrencol has expressed Seth’s interest in seeing you.”

I kept my gaze on the leaves dancing in the wind.

“I’m afraid you’re not dealing with your grief, Prince.”

“My mate is gone. How can I move on? I have no future.” Drakcol mated once. Most mates didn’t outlive each other long. My soul beat for him, and now that he was gone. I had no purpose.

“He is, but you still have things to live for. You are here, Prince Zoltilvoxfyn. You have to find a way to live for yourself.”

That was impossible.

“There are drakcol who survive their mate’s loss. It is not easy, but you can survive this, Prince. You have to choose to, though.”

The session went to its allotted time, and Doctor Jalnin left and Kalvoxrencol returned. My family still didn’t leave me aloneat any time, though they were less afraid I would do something regrettable. I wouldn’t harm myself. Caleb would’ve hated the thought of me taking my own life, and my family did need me, even if it was to watch me wither.

My eyes followed the wind in the leaves. I should’ve had the desire to go outside, but I felt nothing. Kalvoxrencol’s tail wrapped around my wrist, and I didn’t even glance at him. He was the one who spent the most time here with me. I should apologize for taking him from his new mate, but I couldn’t muster the words.

He tugged on me. “Let’s go outside. Please.”

I finally looked at my youngest brother. His expression was pinched, his purple eyes tired, and his shoulders slumped. Not managing a response, I got to my feet and allowed Kalvoxrencol to pull me outside.

The balmy sun brushed my scales as the wind ruffled my hair. The fresh air, the vibrant aromas of the flowers, and the loamy soil. Crystal, it had never smelled so good.

Kalvoxrencol’s tail wrapped around mine and we wandered the jungle terrace. My fingers trailed over the rough bark and the smooth flowers, waiting for the normal peace to descend, but it didn’t. I was still numb.

He brought me to my greenhouse, and I balked; everything would be dead inside. I scoffed. So was I. What did it matter?

The door opened, and I froze.

Bright colors and deep greens greeted me. Not a single plant was dead, let alone struggling.

Seth pointed a finger at my grappling fern. “Now see here, Susan, you do not get to eat me. I fed you several bugs.” Scrapes marred his hands from the carnivorous plant. “You’re a monster, Susan. I will give you a damn bug if you leave me alone.”

He lifted a wiggling bug with a pair of tongs. The fern snapped out and grabbed his fingers wrapped around the metal. Seth yelped.

Glaring at the fern and holding his injured fingers to his chest, he said, “You bitch.”

“It can’t understand you.”

Seth whipped toward me, his brown eyes with their round pupils that were so wide and expressive, like my… The sight of Caleb burned in me as tears threatened to spill. I couldn’t say why right now was the time my body decided to release the numbness, but it did. Grief crashed over me in waves, making liquid spill down my cheeks.

Arms wrapping around me, Seth said, “Let it out.”

With heaving sobs, I fell to the ground, dragging Seth with me. He gathered me close.

“I’ve got you,” Seth said. “I have you. I promise I have you, Fyn.”

Chapter 39

So this is weird.

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