But I know I cannot truly leave. The contract doesn't let me. And while I feel angry enough to be adventurous and find out just how far Soren is willing to go to make me bend to his will, something in me tells me not to test that theory.
And then there's the other part of me—the one that panics at the thought of leaving him. Of taking Landon from him.
Because even if Soren has been deceiving me the whole time, there are things that cannot be faked. The smile he reserves for Landon. The care with which he attends him. The garbled nonsense he sings to Landon in that baby language that makes my son giggle. Soren adores Landon.
Internally, I scold myself. I, too, could have sworn before I overheard that conversation that Soren adored me. But this has never even been about me. And I have thrown myself into the deep end with nothing to pull me out.
There were no clauses underneath the contract that stated the consequences of breaching it, but I know how these things go. I'm in a bind, in debt, and until Soren lets me go, I will not be free.
So I step back. Offer a polite smile to Alpha Baldwin. "My place is with my husband. But I promise to take you up on your offer... one day." I must sound like a stupid broken record.
Hiding my trembling hands behind my back, I address the small crowd. "If you'll excuse me."
I turn on my heel and do what I should've done the moment I saw Soren at the hospital.
I flee.
But I can still feel his eyes on me.
Burning into my back.
Even long after I'm behind the safety of my bedroom door.
Ronan left.
But not without making a scene. He's never lost a single battle in his life, and I know he'll be back. I know him well enough to understand that his retreating only means there's something worse just around the corner.
"I'll be back with the reports," Eric says, but I don't miss the way his green eyes dart to his brother's and hold with a tinge of worry.
I haven't spoken a word to either of them since the Hunt. It's been three days since then. A chaotic three days for us all, and I have been much too calm for someone who just uncovered her husband's plot. Frighteningly so.
"Seraphina—"
I hold up a single finger, poring over Axel's transactions of what should've been funds pumped into the purchase of weapons for the packs closer to Ronan's borders, noting the discrepancies. "Later, Eric."
I know what he wants to say and I have no interest in listening.
He exhales harshly, but nods anyway before leaving.
"It would seem Axel no longer hides his intentions. Might need to look into Ivan, too. There's so much missing?—"
"Seraphina," Soren breathes, voice strained. "Talk to me."
My fingers crinkle the papers. "Should we put this out in the open, it might send the rest into hiding. It would be wiser to find everyone he's working with?—"
A hand circles my wrist and I hiss, jerking away and out of my chair at the unexpectedly hot contact. "Don't touch me."
His chair scrapes, hands bracing on his desk. "You've been avoiding me. You won't let me touch Landon. You don't sleep in our bedroom anymore, much less mine. You can't even look me in the eye."
I make the mistake of meeting his gaze for the first time in days and I instantly regret it. The Soren from the Hunt, cold and cruel is gone, and back in his body is more of the man I thought I knew. Soft, expressive eyes. Lips that twitch for different reasons. Tense shoulders. Clenched fists. "I just need time alone. Surely, that can't possibly be too much to ask after all that has happened."
His eyes flash gold. "I found the notes Ronan sent you. You kept them. Do you plan on returning to him? Maybe your body remembers just how much you miss his touch?—"
"Fuck. You," I snarl softly. "You enjoyed it, didn't you? Inviting him here, knowing it would affect me because you always knew what he was to me. Did you laugh at me? Did you laugh after I cried into your arms and let you touch me? After confiding in you, trusting you? Was my life, my pain a joke to you?"
The desk groans under the weight of his hands. "You know it wasn't."
My heart physically hurts and I don't want it to. I rein in my temper, letting it all ice over. "No. I realize that I do not know a single thing about you."