Page 130 of Mistaken Magic

Hisreaction was not the oneIexpected.Thewords were barely out of my mouth before his eyes trapped me again andHawkestepped into my body.Hishand found the side of my face and he leaned in, closer, but his mouth never met mine.Hiseyes also didn't let go.

"Iwant to kiss you right now," he breathed, the air warm against my lips. "Towatch as your eyes close and your body relaxes.I'mjust not sure that's what would happen."Histhumb brushed across my cheek, almost daring me to close the gap. "Ialready know my lover would approve, butIthink you'd push me off because you don't realize yours would."

"Hawke..."

Hispupils were constricting again, the process oddly enticing. "Ican't imagine you being scared of anything, andIlike that a little too much.TellAspento grow grass."

Myheart was hammering.IknewIshould pull away, but instead, he did.Withoutstopping to look back, saying nothing else,Hawkesimply marched out of my room.Thedoor closed softly behind him andIstill stood there, trying to figure out what the fuck had just happened.

Whydid he thinkIshould be scared of him?Whatwas he thinking saying he wanted to kiss me?HeknewIwas withAspen!Theentire court did!IfItold her about this, would she rip him a new one?Iwould if the situation was reversed.Theidea of someone trying to steal my girlfriend from me?Afriendtrying to do it?

Pushingout a breath,Iturned to look atJack'snew perch.Itwas well made.Nothingfancy, but still done with care.Sittingon it,Jacktilted his head, examining me.Ireached up to pet him, but the ordeal withHawkebothered me more thanIwanted to admit.Ijust didn't understandwhy.Itmade me feel likeI'ddone something wrong.Ihadn't, though.IknewIhadn't, butIstill felt like it.

"Whycouldn't they all have been hideous?"IaskedJack. "Thatwould remove the temptation."

Hemurmured at me softly, the sound rather croaky, yet cute in its own way.

"Sowhat doItellAspen,Jack?He'sher friend!"

"Whois?"Aspenasked, picking that exact moment to walk into my room.

Ijust groaned and ducked my head. "HawkemadeJacka roost."

"Yeah, he was talking about it in fourth period," she said. "Wait.Didhe do something else?"

Pullingin a deep breath,Iturned to face her.Ididn't want to talk aboutHawke, butIneeded something to fix this.Tokeep this from happening again.Mostof all, to remove this annoying guilty feeling.Mymind settled on one thing.

"Whycan't we come out,Aspen?"Iasked. "Whycan't we tell everyone we're together?It'snot likeHarperwill pick on us less, and with the whole court watching out for us, what can she do?"

Shelooked at me for a long moment, then made her way over. "Rain?What'sgoing on?"

"Ijust feel like if we were more open then people would accept it,"Isaid, wondering if that actually would've madeHawkepause.He'dmentioned my lover, so heknew,which might invalidate my theory.Istill kept going. "Makeit clearI'mwith you andI'mnot going to cheat on you."

"You'dhave to move," she told me. "There'sa rule that we couldn't live together.They'dmove someone else in here and you in with another suitemate.Sure, we could date, but we wouldn't be able to spend the night anymore.It'sunderage immorality and all that."

"Idon't thinkLiamwould care,"Iinsisted.

"No, but other parents would," she countered. "Harper'smom, as an example.Allowingkids to have sex and notstopping it.Encouragingus, and all that shit.Why?Rain, whathappened?"

Yeah, there was no getting out of this. "Hawkesaid he wanted to kiss me."

"And?" she asked. "Didhe pressure you?"

"No!"Fuck,Iwas making a mess of this. "He'scompletely fascinated by the fact thatI'mnot scared of him.Ithink it turns him on or something.Hestepped in like he was about to try, andIwas ready to push him off, but he just said he wanted to kiss me.Hementioned his lover approving, which is wrong on so many levels, and..."Ijust flapped my hands beside me. "Iknow he's your friend, and he didn't really do anything, butIdidn't even know he's dating someone!Ijust...Aspen, if we were out, he'd know better, wouldn't he?"

"No, he wouldn't," she said gently, guiding me over toward my bed. "Rain, we're not married.Idon't have any right to stop you from doing what you want.Itrust you enough to include me, even if that's just being honest about it.That'swhat fae consider a relationship.It'snot me owning the rights to your body or you owning mine.Youdidn't sell yourself to me when we started this.Yousimply offered to care, andIthink you do."

"Idefinitely do,"Ipromised her.

"Butthat's the thing," she continued. "Wewere all old enough when we leftFaerieto know how our parents loved, and to think ofthatas normal.Mymother had three lovers -IthinkItold you that before.Twowomen and a man.Hawke'smother was a courtier, which is like very minor nobility in a way.Shehad a few lovers, and they were all together, even though none of them were his father.Mypoint is, the fae are mostly pansexual, kinda like you.Theylove who they love, and gender is less important than attraction."Shepaused to lick her lips. "Whichis why you didn't knowHawkewas dating someone.Yousee, we're not allowed to be intimate with our suitemates."

Mymouth fell open.Sure, she'd told me some of that, but all the bits and pieces were starting to finally make sense in my head.Hearingher mother had been with a woman was one thing.Herdad didn't really sound like he'd been in the picture, after all.AndwhileIknew he was dead now,Iwasn't surewhenhe'd died.Butlike this?Shemade it sound like it didn't matter either way, as if sharing was their way of caring or something.

Nevermind that bombshell aboutHawke! "He'swith a guy?"Iasked, making sureI'dheard her right.

"Yeah," she said, dragging the word out. "See,TorianandIare only attracted to girls.Notthat it can't change, and maybe one day some guy will change our minds, but it hasn't happened yet.Mostpure fae don't think like that, though.Faetend to love who they love, regardless of gender.Theyare with who they want to be with, not just as a couple.Cheatingcan only happen if someone else has the rights to your body, butIwill neverown you,Rain.Ifyou want to kiss him, then kiss him.Ifyou want to have sex with him, then do."

"What?But..."

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