Page 2 of Mistaken Magic

"Thanks,"Isaid softly, trying my hardest to appreciate whatI'dbeen given.

Mrs.Sparksbeamed at me, bobbing her head likeI'djust performed some sort of trick. "Andin the closet, we have nice slacks and proper shirts for you."

Whenshe pulled open the door,Iwanted to cry.Pastelplaid - which should have been ok, and yet somehow wasn't.Thetan khakis were worse, caught between mom pants and something just a little too business-casual.Thenthere were three pairs of canvas shoes.Notthe cool kind, but the cheap white ones fromWalmart.

Theseclothes were exactly the sort of thing that made bullies target kids!Thelast thingIneeded was to get myself in trouble yet again, soIswallowed, trying to think beforeIsaid anything.Thatwas what my favorite foster mom had taught me.Thinkfirst.Respectthat people were trying.Damn, but it was easier said than done.

"Iappreciate this,Mrs.Sparks,"Itried, "butIhave some clothes, and this isn't really my style.Maybeyou can return them?It'sa really nice gesture."

Thewoman's eyes narrowed slightly, but her plastic smile didn't falter. "Oh, no, honey.Thisis what you're going to wear to school.JohnandIbelieve kids like you need structure, and your generation doesn't understand that word.Youwilllearn to dress modestly.Youwill make good grades at school.Ifyou don't, the only place left for you is the state-run home, and none of us want that, right?Solearn to follow the rules, young lady, and fast."

Inodded quickly. "I'lldo my best, ma'am."

"Good.Weattend church as a family onSundays.You'llgo to youth group onWednesdayevenings unless it conflicts with your extracurricular activity.Oncea month, you'll volunteer to do some kind of community service.Everyevening, you'll help with the household chores.Tonight,I'llput you on the schedule, which means you won't need to start that until tomorrow."

Again,Inodded.Whatelse wasIsupposed to do?Thankfully, my easy acceptance seemed to mollify this woman.Smilingat me likeIwas simple,Mrs.Sparkstook me back downstairs and into the living room.Ifollowed, dying to see what the man of the house was doing with my things.YetwhenIwalked into the living room,Idecided this whole "being nice" plan was over.Thebastard was looking through all my clothes and putting most of them into a garbage bag!

"Whatthe hell?"Isnapped. "That'smy stuff!"

Hesighed before looking up. "Theseclothes are not suitable for a girl your age.You'llhave to keep the underthings untilNancycan replace them."Thenhe held up a boring black long-sleeve. "Butthis?Areyou trying to convince the boys you're easy?Wewill not be raising a child having a child here!"

"It'sa shirt!It'snot even low-cut.Areyou insane?"Butthe shirt went into the bag.Beforehe could discard anything else,Ireached past him and snaggedTheo. "Letme guess, the bear's a problem, too, right?"

"That?No.Girlsyour age need comfort."Histone was dismissive instead of understanding.

Myfingers dug into the matted fur, andIclung to my only friend whileIseethed. "Then, while you decide if my slut-wear needs to go,I'llmake sureI'mneither seen nor heard.Soyou know,Iwastryingto be nice!"

Iturned back for my room and heardMr.SparksasIclimbed up the stairs. "Yousee,Nancy?Rudeand temperamental.Nowonder no one else wanted her."

"John, we already agreed to this.Besides, she can't be as bad as those boys."

Great.Throwingmyself onto the bed,Istared at the ceiling.Ihadn't even done anything wrong yet andIwas already in trouble?Fourhours ago, my life had sucked.Now?Yeah, there was no love and understanding in this house.Therewas no feeling of welcome.AllI'dgotten from these people was a list of rules and threats of punishment!

Mr.Sparkswanted to give me stability by changing everythingI'dever known.Mrs.Sparkswanted me to smile sweetly and prove to the world that she was such a good woman for taking in this hard-luck case.Neitherof them were the kind of personI'deven bother to spit on, butIhadn't been given an option.Iwas here.Ihad nowhere else to go.I'drun out of options, so this was going to be my new life.

AndifIwanted something better afterIaged out of the system, thenIneeded to suck it up and deal with this.Ihad to find a way to be what they wanted.Ihadto get my shit together, becauseIcould not fuck things up again.Thiswas my last chance.

Wasit so wrong to want a home?Friends?Tobe loved by someone?Ididn't think so, but it sure felt like everyone else did.Iwas trying!Couldn'tthey see that?Butbefore the tears could start flowing,Ishut myself in my room, decidingIwas done for the night.I'dreached my limit.Dayone, andIalready couldn't take any more.

Formy entire life,I'dbeen judged by my mom's record and my bad luck.I'dbeen screwed over by coincidence and horrible timing.Itwas as if the harderItried to succeed, the biggerImanaged to fail.Oneday,Iwanted to write my own damned story.Onewith a happy fucking ending.

Sadly, today was not going to be that day.

Chapter Two

Thatnight,Iheard the voices of the other kids as they tromped up and down the hall.Noone spoke loudly, though.Therewas this hushed feeling that drove me crazy, as if the entire household was scared to laugh out loud.Ididn't think much of it at first, but the next morning was the same way.

Withseven kids in the house, there should've been a ruckus.Instead, the loudest noise was the hurrying of feet.Iwoke up, but sinceIdidn't have to start school until next week,Ididn't want to get in anyone's way - soIstayed in my room.Goingthrough my things,Ifound a pair of jeans that hadn't been thrown out and a light sweater.Therewasn't much left of whatI'dbrought with me, butIrefused to wear the stuff in the closet.Partlybecause it was hideous.Mostly, it was just on principle.

OnceIheard the bus stop outside the house,Iknew it was safe to get up.Sure, it was early, but it wasn't likeI'dbe able to go back to sleep.Plus, sinceI'dmissed dinner last night, my stomach was currently demanding breakfast.Makingmy way downstairs,Iwas thinking about checking out the neighborhood afterIate.Well, untilIwas spotted.

"Ididn't expect to see you up so soon,Lorraine,"Mrs.Sparkssaid. "Theothers just went to school."

"Iheard, ma'am,"Itold her. "I'ma pretty light sleeper."

Shesimply pursed her lips as if that was something disgusting. "Well,Iguess this meansIcan start showing you your daily responsibilities.Everyevening, one of you kids is expected to make dinner.Someoneelse will set the table.Anotherwill do dishes.There'salso vacuuming, laundry, cleaning the bathrooms, and straightening the living areas.You'reall responsible for keeping your own rooms clean, and yes, we will check."

Inodded.Thiswas pretty standard stuff. "Iunderstand, ma'am."

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