Page 233 of Phoenix's Fire

He chuckled softly. "Headache?"

"Among other things." My words came out like an accusation.

His eyes narrowed. "Which other things? And we should go swimming more often - but without so much wine next time."

"Did you kiss me?" I demanded.

He stepped back, crossing his arms over his chest. "Define that."

"Your mouth on mine."

His jaw clenched. "Yes, I believe that happened."

"You can't just kiss a woman!"

Rymar looked away, pulling in a breath like he was angry. "Theonehalf-decent thing about last night was thinking you trusted me, but here you are, acting like I manipulated you into something. I would like you to know that I just wanted to talk. You, Ayla, are the one who kissedme. So learn how to own your shit, because my head is pounding, and I amnotin the mood to have someone else make me feel like a piece of shit."

"But it's not proper!" I snapped.

His neck tensed first, twisting his head slightly, then he stood a little straighter. That was all the warning I got before he stormed towards me. I backed away, hitting the wall. His hands grabbed my wrists, guiding them down my sides, and he leaned in until his mouth was inches from my face.

"Did you want me to do it again?"

"No," I breathed, but my heart was racing and my chin lifted on its own. My eyes slid back to his mouth as broken memories of his taste teased my mind.

Rymar immediately released me and stepped back, the vehemence of a moment before gone as quickly as it had appeared. What he didn't do was move aside so I could escape. He gave me enough space so I wasn't trapped, but it was clear I couldn't just run away from this.

"Then I won't," he said, but he stayed there, just a little too close to be polite. "That is how consent works, Ayla. 'No' is a word that stops any man in this house. It's what gives you power to control your own body and what happens to it. There's only one problem." He leaned slightly towards my ear. "You're lying."

"I'm not." But only because I was scared of what would happen if he tried to kiss me again.

His tail lashed once before he backed up a step. "Last night, you made it clearyou like kissing." Then he lifted his hands, showing he wasn't chiding me. "There's nothing wrong with wanting it, Ayla, but I can only believe your words. The same for Zasen and Kanik. We will not force ourselves on you." He tipped his head to meet my eyes. "I liked it, but I don't need it, and I swore I'd never hurt you. It's not what friends do."

"But I shouldn't have done that," I whimpered.

Rymar shook his head, offering me a soft smile. "You should, and it's okay to be embarrassed." He ducked his head to scrub at his face. "I am. I had a very bad night, and I just wanted to make it go away. Drinking sounded like a great idea at the time, but I didn't think that through, and I'm sorry."

"But what does this mean?" I asked.

The stair creaked, making me realize we weren't alone. I looked up just as Rymar twisted. About a third of the way down, I could see Kanik's legs. He'd stopped, aware things were a little tense down here.

"You're fine," Rymar told him.

"You're not," Zasen called from the living room.

"Yeah..." Kanik said. "I think I'm going to go let Holly out. I hear her dancing in the kitchen." He wagged his finger between us. "You two finish that talk."

And now I was dying. Clearly everyone had just heard all of this. As Kanik headed toward the kitchen, I saw him make a gesture to Zasen. It looked like he was silently asking him to stay where he was. That made me want to go back to my room where no one could see me, and my face was now burning with shame.

"You're fine," Rymar said, reaching out to clasp my arm. "Ayla, you are a grown woman who is allowed to do stupid things without repercussions. We're friends. That's it. Just a couple of friends who drank far too much wine and made stupid decisions together."

"I'm sorry I messed up," I mumbled.

He rubbed my arm gently. "You did. You made me feel like shit a second ago. Saying that being my friend isn't proper? Or that trusting me isn't? I'm not even sure why you're trying to throw that out this time, but it sucks, Ayla. It's cruel and it hurts."

I gasped, lifting my face with my mouth open in shock. "I didn't mean to!"

"But you still did it," he said. "Now, I get it. You don't know how to deal with being embarrassed, and it used to be dangerous to make a mistake, right? But next time, try saying what you really mean, even if it's jumbled up and stupid?"

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