Page 91 of Never To Suffer

There’s a split second when we both stare at each other, waiting for the other to make the first move. I’m not sure which one of us pounces first as we both bust forward, our mouths slamming together as our bodies fight for dominance and fewer clothes. It’s a fight I’m too close to losing as he pins me against the counter and undoes my belt. I’m kissing him again, ready to give up the struggle and let him take the lead, until a knock at the door freezes us both.

“Should we ignore it?”

“Could be important,” he counters

“More important than this?” I reach down, cupping his bulge as I nip at his lip.

Before he can answer, there’s another knock, this time more urgent. “I’ll be right back. In the meantime? Why don’t you take your pants off and put your hands on the counter for me?”

Well, fuck me.

Xander didn’t tell me he found himself adaddy. I wait till he’s across the room before I give him a whistle. He can see me when he turns, but the counter blocks the important part as I let my jeans fall to the ground with a quiet thud.

“Don’t make me wait too long, Chef.”

“A quick learner. I like that.”

“Excuse me, sorry to bother you. Are you Mr. Lucas Fitzpatrick?” The young kid at the door asks.

“Shit,” I swear under my breath and head toward the door. Theo watches my hands as I walk toward him, re-button my pants and grab my shirt. I could swear he groans when I pull it back over my head.

“Don’t worry. Just means we start all over again.” I wink and turn to the kid. “That’s not my name anymore.”

“Shit, I’m so sorry! You’re right, I read the wrong line!” The kid jerks the envelope out, eyes darting between us as he tries to work it out in his head. “I’m supposed to deliver this.”

I take the envelope and, sure enough, it says my name and my dead name. I hate how archaic our government enjoys being. I glance up at the kid and his eyes still dart between us, trying to figure us out.

“We’re roommates,” Theo enlightens him, rolling his eyes as he tucks his hand into the back pocket of my jeans and giving my ass a squeeze.

“Right.”

Under normal circumstances, I would play along and make a fun show of it, but I’m too distracted by the name on the envelope. It’s a law firm, but not any law firm. It’s the one that represented me when we tried to go after the woman who caused my accident. I can’t focus. A dark curtain comes down over my vision. The air in the room turns thick with smoke and everything smells like gasoline. I can hear the sizzle of flesh, and I know it’s mine.

Theo catches me before I hit the ground, and I don’t register when he helps me to the couch until he comes back with a glass of water and a look in his eye I’ve seen too many times before. Pity.

I open the letter, scanning it as much as I can with my hands shaking the way they are.

“Do you need to talk about it, or?”

“There’s new evidence in my accident. The lawyers want to talk to me.”

CHAPTER 38

THEREFORE I AM

BILLIE EILISH

Why can’tI get this right? I rip out another piece of paper from my notebook and chuck it behind me somewhere to start over again on the next page. Our songs are boring, so I need to write some new ones and get everyone in the studio as soon as possible. If I don’t, we run the risk of losing people’s interest the longer we’re in this competition.

“Ugh!” I groan loud enough to feel like a release, tearing that sheet out to start a fresh one. Maybe that’s my problem. I need to start on a sheet I’ve already used. I glance over my shoulder and shake my head. That’s idiotic. The stack of papers on the shelf has four new songs, a few chorus options to add more lyrics to, and a sketch for the album cover. But I have more to do. I’ve also made three new outfits. Well, half-made, those need finishing, too. Since my sister came back, I’ve been splitting the time between my family here and my family in the hospital. It’s cost me too much time, and while I’ve appreciated the breaks and my sister being back, it’s been chaotic. Ren’s going to be fine. Do I need to be at her bedside every friggin’ day?

Where the hell did that thought come from? It’s my sister and Coop! Of course, I have to be there every day. What’s wrong with me?

“Come on, Dani,” I cheer myself on. “Only five more songs and you can take a break. For editing!”

There’s a soft tap on the door before it creaks open. I don’t bother to look up, too busy with my chicken scratch writing. A low whistle starts behind me before the un-crinkling of paper.

“Dani, how long have you been at this?” Skylar asks.

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