Page 87 of My Office Rival

I was silent for a second, my heart thudding. She couldn’t see how devastated I was. I kept my face carefully blank. “Just stressed,” I said mildly. “You know, with everything with Gene.”

“That’s it?” She crossed her arms.

“Yep.” I walked into the kitchen and poured some water, my stomach clenching, my legs shaking. I didn’t want her to see howmuch of a mess I was. But she was still here, stillpushingme for whatever reason.

“You know what, whatever.” Her voice was rough. “You’re not going to change. I tried.” She shook her head.

My heart stuttered. “Cynthia, I — I’m sorry.” I spread my hands helplessly. “Tell me what you want me to do.”

54

CYNTHIA

Tell me what you want me to do.I stared at him in shock. He needed me totell him.

“Would you ever move to a town like Booth?” I asked.

He swallowed and his eyes flicked away. “No,” he said roughly. “I need the anonymity of the city.”

My stomach dipped. He wouldn’t fight his demons for me. I wasn’t enough.

“Cynthia. You know that. I told you.”

I squeezed my eyes shut.Just like you told me you only do one night.I wasn’t even sure what I was asking for. All I knew was his rejection would be more than I could bear.

“You did,” I said, my voice breaking. With jerky movements, I grabbed my phone and my suitcase.

“You’re leaving?”

“I think I should go home,” I said, my throat starting to clog.Oh no, I need to get out of here.“I’ll, uh, see you, Jason.”Would I?I stumbled down the hall where we’d undressed each other that first night, into the elevator where he’d kissed me like he needed me to live.

Jason didn’t call out to me, didn’t ask me to return. Why couldn’t he take just one tiny step toward me?

I took a cab to my empty apartment and walked in a daze through the dim light into my bedroom. The king-sized bed with the handwoven quilt was a beacon of comfort. I stripped off my clothes and got under the covers.

Mistake.I was alone with my thoughts. I squeezed my eyes shut to keep the tears from coming.I can’t believe how fast that all went up in flames.Jason was never going to change, never going to take that leap from being Mr. One Night to being something more. I could have sworn he’d been sad when I told him I was leaving New York, but no, he’d been fine. The small talk and the way he had calmly eaten his dinner after my revelation—it made me want to scream. The way he hadtoasted me. The way he had asked what he needed to do.As if I should beg him.I dug my nails into my palms.

I texted Margo, not sure I could talk on the phone right now.

Cynthia

I told him. No reaction. He doesn’t care.

I hit send and let my face crumple, let a few tears leak out around the edges.

She responded immediately.

Margo

WTF… He’s an idiot.

I had to smile at that. Margo was my number one supporter.

Margo

What did he say??

Cynthia

---