Page 66 of Of Flame and Fury

Dira snorted. “Alchemists.Everyone thinks it’s their fault. Even Rahn’s blaming herself, thinking she could’ve saved him if she’d spent more time developing sturdier gear. But despite what you all believe, this is no one’s fault but Coup’s. You heard what Bekn said. Coup doesn’t have a cautious bone left in his body. We all told him to slow down, and he refused.” Dira chewed on her bottom lip. “Coup’s ego was always going to end up combusting.”

Kel shook her head. She was too much of a coward to tell Dira the truth: that death stalked her. That it had bound an anchor to her feet.

“I know you, Kel,” Dira grumbled. “And your self-pity is just as unwanted as Coup’s lack of inhibitions.”

Sudden anger sparked at Dira’s words, and Kel held tight to it. She let it pull her up, out of the waves and away from the anchor. Part of her knew Dira was right—even if she didn’t want to admit it.

Bekn had seen what was going on—the destruction Coup brought on himself—and now Dira did, too. None of them could let this keep going. If they did, Coup would truly be lost.

Kel swallowed her anger and reached for Dira’s arm. “Do you know how lucky I am that you snuck into that CAPR race five years ago?”

Dira’s expression softened. “About as lucky as I am that you let a random kid demand a bedroom in your cottage. We should both get some rest. We can deal with everything tomorrow.”

Kel forced a weak smile. “Does this mean you forgive me?”

Dira squeezed Kel’s arm. “I forgave you after our meal in the city. I just decided not to tell you.”

Kel scoffed feebly as Dira shifted forward to embrace her.

“I don’t know what’s gotten into you lately,” Dira mumbled, head tucked into the crook of Kel’s neck. “Fighting is our love language. But you’ve been acting off since we got to Vohre.”

“I know.” Kel tightened her hold on Dira. “I’m sorry. Really.I didn’t mean what I said. I’m happy for—whatever is going on between you and Rahn.”

Dira made a contented sound. “We should head back to our unit.”

Kel stepped back and shook her head, letting brown tendrils fall across her face. “You go. I’m staying here tonight.”

Dira sighed. She stood there, just for a minute, before shrugging off her black jacket.

Kel frowned. “What are you doing?”

Dira sat cross-legged on the dirt. “If you’re staying, I am, too.”

“That’s awful logic.”

“No—you know what’s awful? Howyoulook. When was the last time you got some rest?”

Kel folded her arms. “I’mfine.”

“I’ve been watching the bags beneath your eyes grow like mold.” Dira lifted her chin. “I’m staying.”

Kel didn’t object.

Savita huffed and tucked her head beneath her wing as Kel and Dira found a patch of grass to lie on. As they settled into silence, Kel realized just how tired she was. But her mind refused to let her sleep. No matter how many deep breaths she counted, her thoughts kept spiraling back to Coup.

Sleep seemed to evade her friend, too. Through the darkness, Dira whispered, “We really should tell Rahn about Savita’s nearing rebirth. We can trust her, you know. She’s not Cristo’s minion.”

“I know,” Kel admitted. “But she worships him.”

Dira huffed. “She doesn’tworshiphim. She just… feels like she owes him. He supported her when her parents didn’t and helped her get settled in Cendor. He treats her like a daughter.”

Kel snorted. Too many Howlers were letting debts define them. “What exactly is going on between you and her?”

Dira smiled timidly—such a foreign expression on the winger. “I really like her, Kel. And I hope she likes me. We’ve made a chart of rooms to make out in, so I think she likes me. But it’s just… easy, with her. She’s never stepped foot in Dresva, but she gets it.”

“Gets what?”

Dira paused, then said, “Leaving Dresva was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Leaving my parents… it was like leaving a piece of myself. But Dresva was their home as much as it wasn’t mine. I knew they’d never come with me. Not to a place like Cendor. Bright, dangerous, wild—they’d hate it for all the reasons I love it. And even if she didn’t expect to, Rahn’s found just as much of a home here as I have. She understands.”