Page 16 of The Games We Play

Just like some of my missions and assignments, there’s been nothing but time for me to overthink. I get stuck in my head, mostly about whatever task I am currently required to accomplish and some of the things I’ve done over the years.

Some I’m proud of. Some, not so much.

Before Afterburn, my thoughts were random, sporadic. Flashbacks of my father and how he treated my mother. The years of abuse we both endured for far too long because of my inability to protect not only myself, but my mother.

The years prior to that where I was too embarrassed to bring any friends over in fear they would see my father at his worst. The only person who broke that was Hudson and his annoying persistence of us being friends. I smile and shake my head at the memory of his too big head for his too awkward body, followingme to and from the bus stop. Sometimes, he’d just be waiting outside my front door since it was on the way to the bus stop from his house.

Like an asshole, I would never wait if he wasn’t there. But he would always catch up with me and continue talking my ear off while I just listened.

I never made friends, but Hudson did, and then his friends became my friends, and that small group is the only family I have. Theyknewabout my home life, my father and his ways, even though I attempted to hide it as much as possible. But they never questioned much, judged, or otherwise, making me explain anything.

However, theywouldquestion every sane cell in my body if they knew what I was doing right now. Buying the house next to the woman I fell for at seventeen, who I haven’t seen over a decade, following her, studying her schedule and lifestyle while sitting in my living room with nothing but my rampant thoughts as I wait for her to leave for herdate.

Fuck, even I’m questioning my sanity.

Of course, I justify my actions. Why? Because Mimi was different.

Mimiisdifferent.

She branded herself to me, so quickly, so easily, and I have no idea how she did it. Was it just a vulnerable moment in my life during that time or was clinging to her like she was my lifeline, truly meant to be that? Because the moment I saw her again changed everything for me. Like that lifeline came back to me.

A seventeen-year-old going to camp for the first time, not knowing anyone, should have been the worst, most awkward experience a teenager could have. But, she made it…everything.

It was the first time in my life I truly felt happy, relaxed, and just content with day to day life.

It wasn’t something to get used to, because it was short lived. But it wasn’t camp, the lake, or the environment that made mefeel that way. It was her. I’ve been chasing that same feeling for the past decade, and come up short every time.

There hasn’t been another woman who makes me feel how she makes me feel. Not that I’ve ever cared to try. I’ve never had any type of serious relationship with a woman, just hookups between active duty or during breaks, which were empty and ultimately unsatisfying. My extended periods of active duty trained me to not need sex or desire it as often as I probably should, and jacking off was purely for relief out of necessity.

But the moment I saw Mimi, that desire for her resparked the dead ashes from the fire she created so many years ago, and I can’t stop fucking thinking about everything I want to do to her.

The light in her living room dims, ripping me from my thoughts as I see a car pull up to the front of her house.

The pink Lyft light in the windshield indicates she’s getting a rideshare tonight, which is interesting. She either plans to drink or use that as an excuse to have him drive her home.

That thought pisses me off, but I shove it aside as I watch her exit her front door. She turns to lock it, then proceeds to scurry down her driveway toward the vehicle.

The wind forces her dress back, hugging the front half of her body as the flowy fabric whips behind her. The contour of her hourglass shape is fully visible, as is her cleavage on display from the top of her low cut dress.

Christ.

She looks like a gorgeous, tempting sin, leveling the little bit of sanity I have left.

As the car pulls away, I’m already two steps out the front door and getting into my truck.

9

NAOMI

Ifake a smile back at my date as I force myself to listen to another story about disc golf.

As a chronically single woman, I’ve realized a very important fact about dating.

Every date will not be a home run, but there is always something to enjoy out of it. The process, sure, it can be redundant, but it can also be fun. It’s part of the journey, getting to know someone, listening to their story, and finding pleasure in their company. The less you look at it like a date with the intent to find love, the more we find enjoyment in all the little things.

We can find flaws in anyone, that’s easy, so I make it my mission to find the things I like about them.

Other than the fact that he talks incessantly, he’s aniceguy. I mean, I probably share the same amount of chemistry with a garden gnome, and even though he’s not half bad looking, there is zero happening in the attraction department. In fact, he seems a little pompous and conceited.

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