Page 77 of The Games We Play

I manage to land one punch to the corner of his chin, making him slouch back briefly. Taking my chance, I crawl away from him, clawing at the dirt in the ground to help my get away. My bare feet grip enough of the earth to push myself away but his hand wraps around my ankle, pulling me back as he hits me again. This time, the back of his hand crushes the side of my face, and it feels like my eardrum detonates behind my jaw.

“That’s it.” His exasperated voice sounds muffled, like I’m hearing him underwater. My vision is blurred and nothing makes sense anymore. I open my eyes and the sky is spinning. He’s dragging me. The rocks and twigs bite at my back, but I don’t feel pain anymore. I don’t feel anything anymore.

Droplets of water splash around me. The lapping of waves mix with footsteps, and suddenly liquid ripples over my bare feet, traveling up my legs until my entire body is drenched.

The lake.

It’s cold and bitter, harsh against my scored skin.

He presses my face further into the ground and the waves crash over my eyes, matting my knotted hair to my cheeks. I try to breathe, but it’s a mix of air, and liquid, and pure fear. I choke on water and gag as I gasp for breath.

He loosens his hold and I push myself up, heaving, begging for him to stop.

“Scream again and that’s what you’ll get.” He holds my cheeks with one hand as he grabs my wrists with the other, holding them over my head as the water laps around us. “Are you going to scream, Mimi?”

It’s like staring into the devil’s eyes as I give in to him, to save my life. My fight is gone and I have nothing left. I just need to survive.

I shake my head, my eyes so fucking heavy, and everything just hurts. Everything hurts so much. I squeeze my eyes shut. Tears blend with the droplets that coat my face as he pushes into me again.

I don’t scream. I don’t fight. I just wince with every numb thrust as the silent tears continue to fall.

The pressure is so painful on my weak wrist joints as he bears all his weight onto me. I wiggle my wrists, but he only presses into me harder, heavier. I’ve never felt so trapped, so lost, so powerless.

The lake water is cold as it bites my skin. His jerking movements forcefully pushes more water over my body. It beats against my face as I attempt to dodge the tide, but wishing I could disappear into it so it could whisk me away. Far, far away from here.

I glance up to the sky that I’ve fallen in love with, the sky that’s brought me happiness and peace. The same sky that Seamus observes every night, and I allow it to take me away.

The stars begin to blend with the black backdrop, so I squeeze my eyes closed and reopen them, because I need the light the stars offer.

Orion glows brighter than ever. He finally showed himself to me tonight, and now that I can see him so clearly, I wonder how I never saw him before. It’s like a beacon, like he’s calling me with his stars that shine brighter than all the others in the sky.

I focus on the corners that create the constellation and pray. I never pray. But if there is ever a time to do it, I guess it’s now.

Minutes go by. Hours maybe. Probably seconds. I don’t know.

Everything hurts. Even the cold lake water feels like lava on my skin.

My body jerks without resistance as Nathan shoves into me. Blinding pain radiates from my uterus up to my throat, and it physically makes me feel sick.

Mentally, I want to die. I don’t want to live through the memory of this night.

The mud and rocks pierce my back with each forceful jolt. I can’t feel my fingers, my wrists anchored against the ground with the entire weight of his body, and there is nothing left.

I have nothing left.

“Nathan, please stop.” My defeated, tearful voice cracks as I beg for him to stop, even though I know nothing will help.

In fact, I realize I just made it so much worse for myself.

“Shut the fuck up, I’m almost done.” His vile voice is stern, and nothing in it sounds remorseful.

He palms my chin. His fingers squeeze my cheeks with alarming force. He grunts, pulsing inside me as he loses himself in the pain he’s inflicting while taking his pleasure.

Squeezing my eyes closed, I press my lips together as I endure the torture and push through the disgust. The water laps over my mouth, covering my face. I choke as he pushes me further into the muddy water.

I struggle to breathe, kicking my legs as I toss my head back and forth, but he’s too strong. He’s too fucking strong.

He’s going to kill me.