Page 17 of The Heart of Winter

Looks were never going to get me anywhere in life. That much was clear.

So I sat down at my desk, opened my books, and threw myself into studying with a kind of furious determination.

Yes, I appreciated what my dad said, but I knew better.

Fuck it.

Fuck those idiots.

Fuck romance.

16 YEARS AGO

I stood in front of the mirror again. The same pale face stared back at me, framed by platinum hair, white eyebrows, white eyelashes. But this time, it was the face of a college student, not a high school kid. A computer science major.

Those white lashes still pissed me off, but I worked on not letting it get to me. Ever since I got into college, I had been pushing myself, working hard, getting top grades. That was where I found the most joy and satisfaction.

Even though I was only a freshman, I had already landed an internship at a fast-growing startup, DevApp, and I was damn proud of that.

That night at dinner, my seven-year-old brother, Skye, called me ugly. Dad, of course, scolded him, and I pretended I didn’t give a shit. That was what I had learned to do, and I was getting better at it, shutting them out, twisting my face into a grim smirk, or just keeping my mouth shut like I was above it all.

The day before, Rain and Bay had made fun of me, saying I had a dried-up uterus. I showed them my middle finger. I always acted like they were just idiots and that their crap didn’t bother me. That was what my life looked like, but I pushed through. I fought for what was mine, damn right. I was going to make something of myself.

I heard voices coming from Rain’s room. I pressed my ear to the door. My hearing was normal, not like alphas and omegas, who had hearing like dogs. So I had to try hard to catch the conversation inside.

Dad’s voice came through first.

"Another inch, Rain! You’re getting so tall for an eleven-year-old!"

Then Rain’s voice followed. "Look at my neck glands, Dad. A few days ago, I noticed they got softer, and I think they’re starting to stick out a little… Maybe I won’t be a beta after all?"

Wow. So much hope in his voice. Yeah. Not gonna be a beta. A reason to be ridiculously happy. It stung.

I heard some rustling, then Dad’s voice again, brimming with excitement.

"You’re right! Well, that settles it, you’ll be either an omega or an alpha, though with your height, I’d bet on alpha!"

"That’s so awesome! That means we’ll have three alphas now: me, Snow, and Bay!"

"And Storm, don’t forget our purple one!"

Rain’s grumbling response was too quiet for me to hear, but then Dad continued.

"I’m really happy for you, son. You always said you wanted to have kids of your own. Now that’s going to be possible someday." Dad’s voice was full of genuine joy.

Of course he was happy, another alpha son. Dad was a family man. He loved kids and big households. We were all raised in a spirit of enthusiastic parenting.

Meanwhile, I was the one who wouldn’t give him any grandkids. The one everyone secretly looked at with pity, like some half-person, a failed attempt: a beta. Everybody’ssecondchoice. It was in the name.

To be fair, my parents never made me feel like I was any different. They were loving and accepting, and even though nothing was ever said out loud, there was this quiet expectation built into our family. All my uncles had children, and every time a new baby came along, it was like a celebration.

My parents weren’t the type to push for careers or stress about grades. They were both musicians, with a bit of that hippie spirit in them. Growing up was easy—laid-back, no pressure. They valued other things. A simple, relaxed kind of life.

They loved the country vibe, growing their own vegetables, a small flock of their own chickens, big family gatherings, nights by the fire filled with music and singing. It was all about being together and taking life slow.

Sometimes, I felt like I just didn’t fit in, and there was always this quiet ache because of it. Deep down, I wanted to belong, I loved the atmosphere, the sentiment… But I had to come to terms with the fact that I was meant for a different kind of life: a beta life, intensely career-focused, with no family of my own.

And I wished I simply had a choice. Not a… path set in stone.

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