Page 21 of The Heart of Winter

He just chuckled. I asked if he was drunk.

"Even if I am, so what? You don’t care about me, huh? We’re not together anymore. So what’s your problem, Winter?"

I hung up. And we didn’t speak again for a few years.

In that time, I had other relationships, but they didn’t feel right. There were betas and omegas, but… none of them made my heart beat any faster.

It felt like it had frozen solid in my chest.

Three years ago, I was invited to give a lecture at a college where Finn was teaching, an alumni talk for the programming department. That’s how we ran into each other again.

The vibe was different. The emotions had faded. And I was smart enough not to bring up Storm.

I had just gone through a breakup and was in a shitty mood. Finn had also just gotten out of something. So we talked. We grabbed coffee. And then, when we were standing by my car, saying our goodbyes, Finn took a step closer, wrapped his arms around me, and kissed me.

I was surprised. But I didn’t pull away. Even then, doubt was creeping in, but that night, we went home together. And we had sex.

A few days later, he called me. By then, I’d had time to think it through, so I told him, "Finn, I don’t want to go back to what we had."

But he cut me off, saying, "I’m not asking for that. What if we were just… occasional fuckbuddies?"

And I figured, why not? I wasn’t seeing anyone, I was busy with work, and I already knew Finn.

And that’s how it restarted. Sort of new. But mostly, just the same old thing.

Three years later, here we were, this weird place, meeting once a month, sometimes every two weeks, sometimes every week, depending on our mood.

But with every passing month, I think we both started realizing this was a dead end. I didn’t love him, and I knew he didn’t love me.

This wasn’t the kind of feeling that had a place in my book.

After Finn was gone, I had breakfast, but I still had half an hour before work, so I grabbed my bass and stepped out onto the terrace. I loved the view from up here, the apartment was part of a luxury complex, and I was damn proud I could afford it. All thanks to hard work and a frugal lifestyle.

After tuning the bass, I plugged it in and started jamming a bit, mindlessly, mostly just staring at the skyline, letting my mind empty itself and reset for the day ahead. Music always had this calming, almost numbing effect on me, as my fingers flowed over the strings or slapped out a rhythm.

I gently bobbed my head, tapped my foot, and swayed a little among the notes floating around me like luminous butterflies, my own closed-off, carefree world. A little bubble where I forgot about everything else.

And then my phone beeped, and I knew it was time to wrap it up.

Frowning slightly, I put the bass away, suited up, then headed to the parking lot. The engine didn’t start on the first try, which pissed me off. My head was again full of chaotic thoughts, this was going to be a rough day.

Then I put on my typical, cold, emotionless mask and made my way to the office.

SARIEL

Led by a polite beta from HR, I walked through the halls of DevApp, heading toward Winter Nolan’s office.

My hands were clenched into nervous fists, my throat dry. Every now and then, I ran my fingers through my hair in a tic-like gesture, pushing my bangs out of one eye. I had no idea how the day was going to go.

I’d only seen Winter a handful of times, and always from a distance, usually at company banquets I was dragged to and attended very reluctantly. My father had clearly been planning to pull me into the family business for a while, so he figured I should start showing up and getting used to the atmosphere.

So I had the chance to see Winter with my own eyes, and I have to admit, there was something fascinating about him. His albino appearance made him stand out from the crowd. He came off as aloof, unapproachable, his gaze usually fixed somewhere above the person he was talking to, his whole presence wrapped in a kind of distance.

We’d never been introduced before, not directly. So today was supposed to be the first time I’d actually look at him up close.

He’d been working at DevApp for years, starting back in college. He was a brilliant programmer, truly exceptional, and on top of that, he had a knack for management. My father valued him highly, practically considered him his right-hand man, consulting him on major decisions about acquiring new clients and negotiating contracts.

Winter’s opinion mattered more than anyone’s, except my father’s, when it came to this company and its business decisions.

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