Page 137 of Inside the Sun

"Then why the hell did you punish me!?" I cry out, my voice cracking with desperation.

Anzo’s expression shifts, something flickers across his face. But he doesn’t answer.

Then he turns around and leaves.

A minute later, Matteo walks in, yanks me out of the cage with a few rough pulls, and drags me back to my room.

I’m filthy, weak, and aching all over. Barely able to stay upright, I shuffle to the shower, sit on the floor, and let the water run over my head.

Tears mix with the stream. I’m shaking from the stress and the despair.

But one thing is getting crystal clear. The awareness that Anzo is never letting me go. Even if I betray Summer, I’m not getting out. That option’s off the table. That’s a quiet but intense certainty.

Why? I’ve seen too much. Seen how weak of a capo Anzo really is. Pathetic. Maybe a businessman. Simply not a real capo. I witnessed his failures and he won’t let me go away to spread it around.

I sit there under the water for a good half hour before I finally crawl out, dry myself off half-heartedly, and collapse on the bed. I haven’t felt anything soft in six days. Every bone in mybody feels bruised. I bury my face in the pillow and a broken sob escapes my chest.

***

No idea how many hours later I wake up, though the sleep didn’t regenerate my body as much as I hoped. I still feel awful but… my first thought is of Ragnar, the only taste of freedom, the only flicker of ‘good feeling’ I’ve had inside this fortress. I need to see him. I want it so badly.

But do I have the strength?

I do. I have to.

So I force myself out of bed and stumble to the window. And there he is. Right away, I spot him in the garden, painting sticky insect glue on the trunks of trees.

My heart kicks into high gear. That man means nothing here, he’s at the bottom of the chain, but to me he… What is he to me?

If I were free, maybe I could let myself fall for him. Get close. But not here. Not with this constant level of stress. Here, he’s just… a comfort. A moment of relief. Nothing more. And yet, I still crave him. Desperately. His presence. His eyes, looking at me with understanding. With compassion.

His low status here doesn’t matter, because to me, he has the highest.

Me, who always dated the sons of millionaires, I’m drawn to a simple gardener.

I pull myself together, walk out of the room, head down to the first floor and out the side door that leads to the garden.

No one’s around. I step outside and feel the warm air on my face for the first time in days. The scent of flowers hits me, the sun nearly blinds me. It’s the height of summer.

Dear Fate, even the air smells like freedom.

I lift my head and watch birds soaring for a few seconds until my eyes start to water. I’ve grown unaccustomed to the harsh daylight.

Then I hear it.

A heartbeat nearby. I glance around nervously and spot Ennio Ferro standing at the edge of the patio near a line of planters.

He’s wearing a sharp suit and smoking something that looks like a vape. The smell is medicinal. I recognize it instantly. My brother Bay uses similar stuff all the time. It’s a strong anti-anxiety blend, a calming agent, usually prescribed for high stress or anxiety.

Does Ennio need it? He seems perfectly calm and unreadable, but maybe that’s just a mask. So many of them wear one.

He turns his head my way slowly, his face motionless, blank. But for half a second, his eyes flick to my neck, where there’s still a burn from when Anzo electrocuted me and cranked it way past normal. Then he just looks away.

Shit. As long as he’s here, I can’t go to Ragnar.

What should I do? Wait it out? Or engage? Maybe try to get acquainted with him. In a mafia stronghold, there’s no telling when I may need any kind of help or at least a little kindness.

The scent of the vape is strong, and to be honest, I’d love something like that right now. Just a little relief. Gosh, Ireallyneed it.

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