Page 206 of Inside the Sun

Then the two of them get in the car and drive off.

In a few seconds, they disappear around the curve of the road.

Ragnar and I sit in silence again.

"Was it his uncle? I’m not sure if he’s from the Ferro side, though," I mutter.

"Their dad’s family used to own a pretty big lumber mill and some large forest plots. All the Ferro brothers inherited parts of the woods from their dad. I looked into it when I was doing some research on the Ferros before I took the job at the fortress. It’s possible Mauro owns some land too, and that guy might be his uncle on his dad’s side. But I’m not sure. They’re private people, not connected to the mafia."

"Mauro and Eliano seemed to be in a hurry to leave The Sun. Can’t say I’m surprised." I sigh.

"Yeah. Now Rocco and Ennio will be in charge there, probably with help from their other uncle, Vincenzo Ferro, and his sons. Not exactly a great replacement from the younger brothers’ perspective. Ennio is stern and emotionless, and Vincenzo’s more of an old-school mobster, so they’ll probably reset the Ferros back to how they were before Anzo."

Silence returns. We sit like this for a while, both lost in thought.

But one thought starts to take over. Soon, I have to say it, just throw it out of me.

"Free at last! I still can’t… believe it," I mutter, feeling like I might faint again. Hunger, dehydration, and pain are all hitting me at once. "But I feel… like shit."

Ragnar’s face softens again. "This nightmare is ending, Sun. You’re going home, you just have to hang in a little longer."

He leans toward me a little, his eyes radiating warmth.

"You are very strong, you know? And through all of it… you didn’t lose yourself. You stayed remarkably true to yourself and pure—"

"That’s bull!" I protest. "I’m not pure at all… Just ruined."

"You clearly don’t know what I mean by ‘pure’," he says. "You’re not ruined, Sun, far from it. You’re like a wildflower growing in hostile soil. And you still bloom."

I barely hold back a smile.

"That’s the most beautiful compliment I’ve ever gotten. You know what else acts just like that?"

"What?"

"Weeds!"

Ragnar laughs softly. "Well, weeds are stubborn. You can’t easily kill them. They survive everything. And some of them are… beautiful."

I can tell he’s trying to cheer me up. His smile is soft and encouraging, like he wants to give me a little more strength to push past this dizzy, almost-fainting feeling, even though the adrenaline is still buzzing in his own veins. So I smile back, big, feeling grateful.

With all this chaos swirling around us, through all the motion and turmoil, one thing stays the same. I genuinely enjoy being in his presence, wrapped in his energy, seeing the care in his eyes, the hint of tenderness. It makes me feel tingly, like there are butterflies in my stomach, and I’m definitely not used to that. Those feelings, the excitement about being near another guy, have seemed long forgotten to me.

"For now, I feel only dirty and exhausted, that’s for sure," I mumble.

His eyes are on me the whole time. "It’ll pass. You’ll bloom again."

He slowly leans in and leaves a soft kiss on my cheek, and I… blush. What an unexpected feeling.

My relationships were never about that intimacy, closeness, not since Dogger. So I’m out of practice. No one looks at me like Ragnar, beyond my dad, like they actually see me.

But maybe I could… open myself up to feeling important to someone again? To be the whole world to someone one more time?

Almost weird, not to be just a 'fuckboy'. I’ve been like that for the past two years, if I’m being honest. It wasn’t just Anzo,nobody really meant anything, and I didn’t mean anything to anybody beyond myass and looks.

We’re still sitting there, staring at the road.

Every now and then, I glance down at my stomach, at the hole in my shirt where the bullet went through, realizing that everything that happened today is going to hit me later, once the adrenaline wears off, and it won’t be easy.

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