Page 48 of Inside the Sun

Another minute. Then two. I don’t know how many more. Finally, I start to whimper. I thrash like an idiot, trying to push myself upward as if I could lift off the floor, but you can’t jump in mid-air. Every jerk just makes the cuffs dig in worse, sending burning, searing pain through my wrists.

Finally, I can’t breathe right anymore.

A broken sound escapes me, half sob, half scream.

"I’m gonna die here. Fuck, I’m gonna die here. Geeeeez, it hurts so bad," I sob. "Please, Summer, tell me how you do it, how the hell do you make it not hurt…" I cry out.

Silence answers me. I don’t expect anything else. I know in situations like this, you’re on your own. You can’t count on yourfellow sufferersfor shit.

"Anzo!" I scream. "Please, come back, please get me down, fuck, I can’t do this! I’ll be good, I promise! The nicest pet you ever had!!!"

Silence.

"It hurts. It fucking hurts! It hurts so bad," I keep wailing.

In my worst nightmares, I never imagined how effective such a torture would be. That bastard was right. He can break me way too easily. Again and again.

"Anzo! Anzo!!!" I scream at the top of my lungs, using every bit of strength I have left. The pain is just excruciating.

And then I realize, if it gets any worse, I’m gonna pass out.

My body’s no longer mine. Another victory for that bastard. Another fucking win. God, every plan I had, every hope, shattered. Why is pain such a brutally simple tool?

At some point, it crosses some invisible line inside me.

I feel myself slipping into merciful darkness.

***

I wake to movement around me. It’s Anzo. He unchains me and lowers me to the ground.

The second my arms move from being above my head to a more natural position, white-hot agony tears through me. I scream at the top of my lungs, on the edge of blacking out again.

"Aaaaaa!!!"

Tears pour down my face uncontrollably. My whole body is still being tortured. Everything hurts, not just my hip, not just my ribs or muscles. Now it’s my shoulders too, burning with sharp, blinding pain.

I feel like jelly. All I want is for this pain to stop.

"Well, how’s that, pet? You enjoying this?" Anzo sneers. "Still feel like mouthing off? ’Cause I swear, I could leave you hanging here all fucking night…"

The thought alone, makes my breath catch in my throat.

"No, I’m sorry. Anzo, please. Please forgive me… I’ll behave. I promise!"

I hate myself for those pitiful, undignified words. I know how small I sound now, like a kicked puppy, but pain is a stronger enemy than pride, and I can’t beat it. I’ll have to find another way to get back at this bastard. Something that makes me feel like I haven’t losteverything.

Anzo chortles, then spits. His saliva hits my shoulder.

"You’re pathetic, boy. What a fucking disappointment."

He unhooks Summer and drops him to the floor. He lands the same way as before, on his knees. He doesn’t look like his arms hurt at all. Either he’s used to this… or I don’t know what the fuck kind of magic trick he’s using.

Anzo hands him something.

"Unlock his crotch."

Summer stands, head bowed, and walks toward me. I’m still lying flat.