Page 10 of Love Potion

“You’re wrong.” I wish he wasn’t. I wish Bane could love me, but he knows why it would never work between us.

“Okay. I’ll let it go.”

“Thanks,” I mumble.

“But if I could leave you with this.”

I focus on him, noticing the sincerity in his expression. “Go ahead.”

“I took a chance reaching out to you because it mattered to me. I needed you to hear my apology for the way I treated you. I knew there was a good chance you’d tell me to fuck off and I accepted that. Sometimes, when something really matters to you, you just have to take the chance. At least then you know the outcome, instead of wondering the rest of your life.”

His advice stings a little. I’ve often wondered what could be with Bane if I were a normal guy. I’ve wondered if I could somehow make myself feel the things I hear and read about. Could I find it in me to want his touch in a sexual way instead of the comfortable platonic affection we share now? If I couldn’t, Bane would either be settling or he’d just tell me it won’t work. Then it would be awkward. I’d hate that more than anything.

“Noted.” I offer Alec a stiff smile. “I hope you find someone again.”

Alec’s face lights up. “I have. Getting married in a few months if you can believe it.”

The news startles me, but I’m not sure why. Alec always wanted to settle down. Then I realize what it is. At almost forty-two, I gave up hoping for marriage a long time ago.

“That’s wonderful. Congratulations.”

“Thanks. He’s well worth the journey it took to get to him, and I’m so happy. I want that for everyone I care about, you included.”

“I appreciate that. All of this, actually. Thanks for reaching out.”

“Thanks for accepting.”

I can tell from his expression he has more to say. “What?”

He leans closer. “You know the sex thing didn’t bother me, right? Because I enjoyed your company on many levels. I know I said some stuff…”

I nod. “Yeah, I know.”

“Anyone who’s worth a damn will understand that too. You’re not less than anyone else, Jerr.”

My eyes sting a little, but I blink back the emotion building there. “Thanks.”

Alec squeezes my hand. “Just remember that. There’s a guy out there who will love you the way you are. He might be closer than you think.”

After leaving the bar, I sit in the back of my rideshare, staring at the lights and buildings as we pass and replaying the conversation. I appreciate Alec’s apology, even though the things he said hardly mattered to me anymore—they just added to the pile of unkind words I’ve gathered up over the years. But at least he felt bad about it. Bad enough to reach out.

When we arrive at Moby’s, I exit the car, taking a deep breath before stepping inside. It’s quieter now since it’s almost eight on a Monday night, but there are still quite a few tables with people eating at them.

I scan the restaurant, looking for Bane and finding him talking to a couple of guys by the dart boards. I head to the bar where Indy and Salem are folding some t-shirts for the merch wall.

“Hey, guys.”

Salem smiles. “You’re back. How was it?”

“It was fine.”

Bane’s strong hands clamp onto my shoulders from behind, massaging gently. “Hey.”

I twist my neck, trying to see his face. “Hey.”

Bane steps in front of me, searching my eyes. “Are you okay?”

I nod. “Yeah. I’ll tell you more later, but it was fine.”

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