Page 54 of Man Advantage

That thought made my stomach fold in on itself. I hoped—and Ibelieved—that Bryan didn’t put up with anyone talking shit about me in front of the kids. That was one of the few areas where we’d managed to remain civil. He even put his foot down with my ex-mother-in-law, who’d never been my biggest fan. She probably had all kinds of things to say about me now that I was her precious son’s asshole ex.

I fought the urge to squirm in my seat as the assistant head coach talked about… something. Whatever. I wasn’t payingattention. I was too wound up about Chats and my kids and… just everything.

Fuck me. It was bad enough I was gone all the time. What if that was driving me away from my kids? What if their potential stepfather was adding his own little wedges to subtly widen the divide?

And it occurred to me that the whole reason Cam was living in my house right now and suffering through terrible cartoons was that Bryan had given me an ultimatum. That he’d threatened to try for full custody, pulling the boys even farther away from me.

What if that was the plan—to steadily chip away at my relationship with the twins until I was lucky to have a weekend a month with them?

And what if it worked?

I’d been distracted at our home opener because I was an idiot for Cam. In the games since, I’d had my head together, and I was already on track for a solid season. If I kept up my current points-per-game streak, and I didn’t go down with any injuries, this could be a record year for me.

Tonight, though…

Tonight was not going to be a good game.

Ever since that bullshit from Chats during this morning’s team meeting, I’d been wound tight and pissed off. I’d usually pass out right away during my pregame nap, but today I’d tossed and turned the whole time. As I’d gone through all my routines, gearing up and getting ready for warmups, I’d been distracted, and the distraction hadn’t been nearly as pleasant as the home opener.

And then during warmups, Chats and I passed each other at one point and made eye contact. The grin that flashed across his face made me want to kick his skates right out from under him.

I hated this. I hatedhim. I didn’t even know if his aim was to make me jealous that he had Bryan, or if he was just rubbing it in my face that he was getting laid while I—as far as anyone knew—wasn’t.

Jealousy wasn’t an issue. I still had some feelings about my divorce, but I didn’t want Bryan back. Chats could have him.

The rest? I genuinely didn’t care. So what if he was getting laid? I didn’t even want?—

That thought almost made me trip as I stepped off the ice and into the tunnel.

Up until recently, Ihadn’twanted to get laid. My libido had been dead and gone, and if anything, I’d just wondered how the hell Bryan could be interested in sex or dating or anything at all. Hockey had barely interested me.

Oh, but my libido was awake now, and it had been ever since…

I shivered, goose bumps springing up under my gear as I clomped toward the locker room.

Ever since Cam had arrived.

Well… that was a pleasant, if mildly distracting and seriously frustrating, train of thought. Nothing was going to happen between us, and I was surprised I hadn’t made an ass of myself living with him, but still. Beat the hell out of fixating on Chats and his bullshit.

And that kept me going right up until we were back on the bench. We were all standing for the national anthem, the stadium lights dimmed so people could focus on the flag and the singer. Bells and Hoes stood between me and Chats, all of their backs to me.

After the song had wound down, but just before the bright lights came back on, Chats turned around, and we once again made eye contact.

He smirked.

And he fuckingwinked.

And all those pleasant thoughts about Cam scattered.

If not for my mouthguard, I probably would’ve ground my teeth to dust as I dropped onto the bench. I needed to stop letting him get to me like this. He was a bag of dicks. He was an antagonistic piece of shit. Why was I letting him fuck with my mood, not to mention my hockey?

Hockey, Trevor. Focus on the hockey.

I tried my level best to do exactly that. Martin’s line managed to pin Chicago into their own defensive zone, and one by one, they peeled away. Hoes, Bells, and I joined our top D-pair, and they too went for changes while the three of us kept the puck deep in the zone.

Bells managed a gorgeous shot on goal. Shit, this kid was going places; he only had a handful of points so far this season, but his instincts were on point and his shot was deadly. If not for the miraculous save by Chicago’s goalie, Bells would’ve had the first goal of the game.

Fortunately, the goalie’s rebound control wasn’t that great, and Hoes managed to snag the puck away.