Page 14 of In the Stars

“In the Stars! In the Stars! In the Stars! In the Stars! In the Stars!” the crowd chants, drowning out any other words I try to speak.

I look back at my bandmates, and they shrug. But they don’t know what the song means. They don’t understand the significance of it and can’t understand why I’m hesitant to sing it.

Blowing out a sigh, I start the chords for “In the Stars” and the crowd calms down. I hum the opening beats, a lumpforming in my throat and my high vanishing as if it never existed.

I swallow roughly before I open my mouth, singing the chorus of the song before I dive into the lyrics.

In our next life, we could be more…

So much more than what we are…

So for now, baby, look for me in the stars…

The crowd singsalong in perfect pitch the entire time. I lower my lids, and the gray eyes of Jaxon swim behind them. I try to push him away, but I can’t stop seeing his face, his smile. Then I feel his betrayal, the broken trust.

I let the crowd finish the song, as words fail me.

It’s been so long since I’ve thought of Jaxon past a second or two. I’m not sure why memories of him are hitting so hard,right now, but I need to drown them out as soon as possible. Thinking about him does me no good. He’s my past, someone I thought I knew.

Someone I thought would keep their word to me.

When the song wraps up, I thank the crowd and hurry off the stage. I ignore everyone who tries to speak to me, pushing past people and blowing off fans that have backstage passes. I don’t want to be around anyone. Zed will tell them something to mollify them, I honestly don’t give a fuck if they’re pissed at me or not. I already have their money.

I’m almost to my dressing room when I hear, “He’s probably trashed. Rumor has it he’s a low-key meth head. That one page on Insta says he’s a junkie or some shit.”

I stop in my tracks, my blood boiling.

Without a word, I turn around and walk over to the group of three guys standing by the wall. I’m not sure which one called me a junkie, but I cock my fist back and punch two of them in the face before they know what’s happening.

A haymaker catches me in the side of the head, and I stumble into the wall. It gives all the men time to jump on me, trying to knock me to the ground. I throw punch after punch, catching soft flesh and hard bone. The hits jar my hand, but I don’t stop.

Soon enough, security rushes over to pull us apart. I’m fucked up, but so are they, the three of them looking a little worse for wear against little ol’ me. I spit blood from my mouth and smile at them. “Who’s the meth head now, bitch?”

“I’m going to fucking sue your ass!” the man with the worst of it shouts, his eye already swollen, and his nose leaking like a faucet.

“Go ahead. It’ll be more money than you’ll ever have in your entire miserable fucking life.”

I pull away from the people holding me back and storm to my dressing room. Sitting at the vanity, I check my face and smile at my reflection to see the blood coating my teeth.

Zed storms inside, slamming the door behind him. “What the fuck, Ryder? Do you know how much that will cost? This is your third fucking fight with a fan. Do youwanta career?”

I shrug and pull a cigarette from the pack on the vanity before lighting it with an engraved lighter Vic gave me after our first show. “Just fix it, Zed. That’s your fucking job.” He huffs, but I ignore him. “I’m going to the bus.”

With that, I push past him and head to the tour bus, ignoring the jeers and taunts behind me.

SIX

WESLEY

“Hold still, baby,”I tell the naked woman lying on the coffee table in front of me. She giggles, the lines of coke undulating on her tits. “Don’t want to waste anything.”

“Sorry, Ryder,” she says with a breathy chuckle. “God, I can’t believe I’m doing this. With you. I didn’t think you’d notice me downstairs. I’m a big fan.”

“I know, baby,” I tell her, gliding my hands up her sides.

“Hurry up. It’s cold in here.”

“That’s so I can see how hard these get for me.” I lap at one of her nipples, pulling a moan from her. “Now don’t move. A quick bump, then I’ll take you to bed.”

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