Garrett groaned.
“Yeah. Well, about three weeks before the wedding, he was over one night and brought it up again. He kept pushing and talking about how we were so close to the wedding date.” I pulled in a deep breath. “So, I slept with him. He was my fiancé, and I felt like I owed him that.”
Garrett pulled me closer. “That’s not the way that works.”
I struggled to maintain my composure. “No one knows I did that, so please don’t tell anyone.”
“I won’t.”
“When I woke up the next morning, Skeeter was already gone. He’d slipped out during the night.” This blanket was going to be soaked by the time I finished my story. “He came into the shop as the morning rush subsided and pulled me aside. There weren’t many people in the shop, thankfully. And we were tucked in a corner. Anyway, Skeeter started the conversation by asking for the ring back. I made the mistake of asking why. He admitted that he’d been seeing other women, and he said that...” I couldn’t make the words leave my mouth.
Garrett closed his eyes, his thumb rubbing circles on my shoulder.
We sat in silence for a few seconds.
“He compared me to the other women, and said I wasn’t very good. I was inexperienced and couldn’t compete with the ladies who’d practiced a lot. I’m paraphrasing. I’ll spare you the way he said it.”
Garrett tensed. “I hope I never meet him.”
“After he left, I closed the shop, took all the doughnuts with me to my apartment, and ate myself sick. I didn’t open the shop again for a week. But I’d sneak back and make doughnuts during the night so that I’d have enough for the following day.”
“That’s why you knew Eli and Delaney would be concerned.”
“I knew Eli would be. Delaney doesn’t know the whole story. She might now. Eli doesn’t know about the night before. He only knows Skeeter broke up with me.” I blinked, hoping the tears would stop burning my eyes.
“Probably best to keep Eli in the dark about that part.”
“When I finally did open, people kept coming in to tell me about how they were sorry and how they knew Skeeter had been seeing this person and that person. Because of the town gossip, I learned how much I’d been cheated on. I ate as many doughnuts as I sold for the next two months. Which was horrible for business and for my health. I put on a lot of weight then. I was almost unrecognizable.”
“That’s why you don’t eat doughnuts.”
Avoiding eye contact, I nodded. “I woke up one morning and decided to move on. I stopped eating doughnuts and gave up the idea of dating. That was seven years ago. Most people that know I don’t date think it’s because I’m afraid of falling in love. That’s not it. I’m afraid of what comes after. And by avoiding romantic relationships, I never have to make myself vulnerable in that way again. I can’t risk ever feeling that way again. So, I just stick to what I’m good at. Does that even make sense?” I braved a look at him.
He stared out at the sky. “It makes sense.”
His words added to my ache. If one man thought I wasn’t good, most men would probably agree. My admission might even change the nature of our friendship, but he deserved to know, no matter the outcome.
“Maybe I should just let you—”
Garrett pulled me close. “I knew when I asked you to stay here that you didn’t date. It’s part of the reason I didn’t kiss you. And if you’d told me this story weeks ago, I still would’ve asked you to sit with me on this roof and watch the stars.” The wind blew, and he pulled the blanket around us tighter. “Where does it say that only people who are dating can spend time together? I’m not asking you to kiss me. I’m not asking you to—”
“Don’t say it.”
He chuckled but it didn’t have its usual ring. “You are the most giving person I know. And I don’t say that lightly. Given what I know now, I think you edged out Ava when you helped me get my jeans off.”
I covered my face with my hands, forgetting I had a half-full mug of lukewarm chocolate in one of them. Chocolate splashed all over me and the blanket just as the mug whapped me in the face. Laughing, I wiped my face with the blanket, which wasn’t much help. “Oh, ouch. Now we’ll have matching bruises.”
“Need me to lick that chocolate off you?”
“Garrett! Friends don’t do that.”
He wrapped his arms around my waist. “Wedecide what we do as friends. Outside rules do not apply.”
“I never thought of it that way.”
He kissed my forehead. “You let me know what’s okay. And I won’t push beyond that. Ever. But if at some point in the future, you change your mind about what you want our friendship to look like, please tell me.”
I hugged him, then pulled back when he tensed. “Sorry. I forgot about your ribs.”