Page 61 of Loved By Tandy

“What are you reading?”

Tandy tilts the book so that I can see the cover.

“That’s your book.” I’m a little surprised because isn’t part of the fun of reading discovering the story? Tandy has nothing to discover. She wrote it.

“Yes. And it’s a good book. When I need to calm down, I read something I know I’ll like.” She sets the book down and gazes at me as if waiting for me to tell her why I’ve walked into her bedroom at this time of night.

I stroll up to the bed. “Scoot over. I want to cuddle you and talk.”

Without hesitation, she shifts over. “You’re scaring me a bit, Matthew.”

I lie down and hold out my arm for her to snuggle in close. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid. I saw the doctor today.”

“The pains?”

“They’ve subsided, but they got pretty bad the day we were at the old place. That’s why I was in the bathroom so long. I’ve never experienced pain like that. And there were other things I couldn’t ignore.” I explain what happened and that I had an appointment today. “I wasn’t going to say anything until I knew what the results were because it seems horribly unfair to ask you to keep a secret like this, but I can’t do this alone.”

She pushes up, and her lips meet mine. “You aren’t alone. And dagnabbit, I love you too.” Her head settles into the perfect spot over my heart. “What did the doctor say?”

“He told me he needed to run tests to rule out some things. I have several appointments this week. And he also told me not to google my symptoms.”

“And you ignored him, I suppose.”

“I did. Cancer is a possibility.” It’s the first time I’ve said the word out loud, and I hate the way it sounds.

She runs her fingers through the hair on my chest. “Whatever this is, I’ll be here for you while you fight it. And maybe it isn’t the C-word.”

“I hope it isn’t. It feels like I’ve finally found a new normal after being widowed. I love my life. I talked about downsizing, but I didn’t mean a pine box.”

She swats my chest. “Not even remotely funny. And you are not allowed to die. Dying would be way worse than crawling out the window and running away.”

I kiss the top of her head. “Leaving you is the last thing I want to do.”

We lie there, snuggled together. She doesn’t pepper me with questions I can’t answer. Her presence offers a calm I haven’t felt in days. And this woman must be made of pixie dust because the sleep I craved is overtaking me. My own snore wakes me up, and we both roll to our sides.

Spooned behind her, I drape an arm over her waist and whisper, “I love you, Candy girl.”

She snuggles closer. “I love you too.”

Or maybe I’m dreaming. A lot of this feels like a dream.

No matter what little time I have left, I want to spend it with her. I want us to get married, to live in the same house, and to snuggle like this every night.

CHAPTER 25

TANDY

Matthew is talking again, and if I move in the slightest, he snuggles even closer. I imagine the stress of not knowing what’s wrong is responsible. Or maybe he’s always a cuddler who talks in his sleep.

I’ve dozed in spurts, during the quiet between his one-sided conversations. The last one was pretty much a play-by-play of his doctor’s appointment.

The two cups of tea I had before bed are screaming to be released from my bladder, so I wiggle out from under Matthew’s arm and slide out of bed. He’s still sound asleep when I return. Thankfully.

As soon as I’m back under the covers, he drapes an arm over me. “You left me. Please don’t leave me.”

“I was just?—”

“Tandy, I want you with me for the rest of my life. Even if it’s short. Let’s get married.”

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