Page 55 of Tag

Then minutes.

No replies from either.

The bathroom door creaked open. Layla stepped out looking pale, like she was holding her breath in her throat and didn’t trust herself to exhale.

“I have to wait now,” she said, barely above a whisper.

“Mind if I brush my teeth while we do that?”

“Go ahead.”

I brushed by her and moved through my routine on autopilot, brushing my teeth while trying not to stare too long at the three tests lined up on the counter beside the sink.

The taped-up window didn’t make this any easier. I moved on to my skincare next. Minutes crawled, and my heart started racing like I was the one waiting for life-changing results. Layla brushed her teeth once I was done, and then we both prepared to confront the tests. We stood there, side by side, as she checked one by one. When her breath hitched and tears welled up, I wasn’t sure if we were celebrating or having a breakdown, but then she threw herself into my arms, her whole body shaking as she sobbed, and I made out the words, “No baby.”

I wrapped my arms around her tightly, grounding her while my own eyes stung. She clung to me like I was the only thing keeping her from breaking, and I let her cry it out. I couldn’t help but think about my own problems. My issues suddenly seemed much smaller in comparison.

“Come on,” I urged gently when she calmed down. “Let’s get some sleep.”

She nodded, wiping at her cheeks, then moved to toss the tests. I watched as she buried them deep in the bathroom trash, shoving tissues on top like that might erase the whole night. Once she crawled onto the far side of my king-sized bed, I turned off the overhead light, leaving my fairy strings glowing. I grabbed the chair from my desk vanity and propped it under the bathroom door handle for extra security, even though we were on the second floor. Layla didn’t say anything, just watched me, her expression unreadable. I slid into bed beside her, and the second my head hit the pillow, I was drifting to dreamland just like I knew I would.

“Lay...do you want me to get you condoms? Or maybe birth control?” I managed to ask, half-asleep.

I felt her shake her head. “He won’t use them. Says it feels better without.”

I stared up at my ceiling, counting down from five before speaking again. “Is he still…and this is what you want?”

She was quiet for a long moment. “Yeah. It’s complicated, but I really--I love him.”

I knew this wasn’t a battle I could win, so I kept my mouth shut after that and let my lids fold over.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Mhm.” I didn’t open my eyes.

“Have you ever messed around with any of your guy friends?”

This wasn’t the first time someone had asked me that. I’d been questioned about my relationship with each of them at one point. So had Ari, Roxxi, and Cloe. People found it hard to believe that our bonds were far deeper than anything sexual.

“I know it’s a common assumption, but no. None of us has ever fooled around with each other.”

“Really?”

“Our friend group’s always been platonic. There’s some harmless flirting now and then, but that’s all. Like I said earlier, we’re like a family.” My brow furrowed, “That doesn’t sound right with the flirting thing, but you know what I mean.”

She was quiet for a moment. “You and Ryder don’t seem like just friends or family.”

That was because we weren’t.

Whatever we were, it didn’t fit neatly into any box or tick off any societal labels. Our parents were best friends long before we ever took our first breaths, so maybe it started there.

I was always meant to know him.

I think I was born loving him.

Somewhere along the way, I learned what it meant to beinlove with him.

“Ryder and I are a lot of things,” I replied quietly. “But we’ve never been together.”

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