He turned and leaned against our row of lockers, arms crossed, his expression casual. There was a knowing look in his eyes that told me he already knew where my mind had gone. My brother could read me better than anyone and had a way of seeing straight through whatever mask I wore.
“I will never understand why you chose this route to get our girl.”
“In case you missed a few chapters, I didn’t exactly have a choice.”
“That piece of—.” He stopped himself, remembering where we were.
I covered him with a laugh no one would question.
“Just relax. Everything’s gonna work out.” His voice was calm again. The same tone he always used when he was trying to ensure I remained level-headed. Usually, it was the other way around, though I wasn’t sure if it was me he was telling that to right now or himself. Likely both. There was only one part of my life where I had started slipping up. One person who fucked with my head without even trying. I shot him a look of gratitude. Hehad just reminded me that no matter how shifty shit got, I had control.
“I’m good,” I assured him, running a hand through my hair, still damp from the shower. “Let’s get out of here.”
The three of us said bye to a few of the guys and then left the locker room, making our way to the parking lot. It felt good outside. The cool air was a nice reprieve from the heated steam. I immediately caught sight of Brooke standing by my truck. A smile spread across her face when she spotted us.
“I’ll meet you guys at the house,” Xander said, splitting off to go to his car.
I acknowledged him with a nod and crossed to my ride. “Have you been out here alone this whole time?”
“No, Roxxi and the others just left.” She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around me.
I gave her a quick kiss, smothering my agitation.
I caught a whiff of her signature body spray and looked down at her. Appearance-wise, she was a cheerleader cliché through and through. In reality, she was extremely down-to-earth. Unlike in high school, none of the girls on the Crowsfell squad carried themselves like self-absorbed, higher-than-thou bitches. That wasn’t to say some hadn’t tried. They just didn’t make it past the final boss, Roxxanne Sterling.
Roxxi had a zero-tolerance policy for bullshit. Was she rich as hell like the rest of us? Absolutely. The golden apple of her parents’ eye? Without question. They would raze this entire town if it meant protecting her. She had us, too, and that in itself was a statement. She never allowed any of that to inflate her ego or be a reason to treat others badly.
If anything, she always made sure people were treated accordingly, and that could go either way. Pissing her off was never in anyone’s best interest. If someone went low, Roxxi was going lower, straight down to hell with a grin on her face. Shewas Sanjana’s first new friend when we started second grade. Once I accepted that I would have to share my girl, in this regard at least, I allowed and then encouraged their friendship. They met Arianna and Cloe the year after, and the rest was history.
Not seeing any of them anywhere or hearing Roxxi’s Ducati fade away as she drove off, I wondered how long ago they’d actually left. Brooke was too considerate to tell me she’d been standing out here alone for any substantial amount of time. I already knew where the girl I wanted to see the most was. That didn’t stop something dark twisting inside me at the thought of him with her. Possessiveness, jealousy, whatever the fuck you wanted to call it, rose up fast and hard.
Ashton was the one guy who managed to slip through the cracks and ask Sanjana out without me or one of the boys shutting him down. Too many to count had tried and failed before him.
Everyone knew she was ours, collectively.
It wasn’t a claim that needed words; it was unspoken in the way we stood between her and the rest of the world. It was known to plenty that I wanted more. That I needed her to be mine in a way no one else could touch. The thought consumed me, creeping into the quiet spaces of my mind and tightening like a vice around the organ in my chest that had her name carved into it. I’d never forgive myself for things getting to this point. Letting deadweight, Ashton Hayes, of all people, become a footnote in our story. I’d known he was interested. I could see it in the way he hovered near her, the way his eyes tracked her every move. I knew all the tells because I wrote the playbook.
I should have done something about it, but again, this wasn’t the first time a guy had looked her way. A blind man would. All they needed to do was listen to her talk or hear her laugh. And she smelled incredible, always lathered in shea and cocoa butter with a subtle hint of theSantal RoyalperfumeI gifted her. Making sure guys kept away from her was like a full-time job. Things had been a different kind of chaotic when Ashton made his move, and that’s the only reason it happened.
Between football, keeping an above-average GPA, and the pressure my dad was putting on me to be more involved in family matters, I had been stretched thin. Being a Voss came with responsibilities, ones that had me moving in circles most people couldn't even imagine. With all that going on, I wasn’t keeping close enough tabs on Sanj.
The others were just as busy for the same reasons. We got distracted just long enough for Ashton’s punk ass to slip in and ask her out.
Andshesaid yes.
It would’ve hurt less if she put a bullet in my skull.
Knowing why she did it was the only reason I didn’t lose my mind completely back then, but I was coming real fucking close as of late, watching her give him what I’d been starving for. Smiles. Time. Parts of herself that belonged to me. I looked at her gorgeous face every day and pretended it wasn’t eating me alive, like a disease that would gut me slowly if I didn’t rip myself open first. Ashton wasn’t even close to being good enough for her. He and I both knew it, but if I pushed too hard, Sanj would dig her heels in just to prove a point or panic. She was stubborn like that and had only recently started to get over her denial about us. So, I haven’t pushed it yet. I played it cool, betting my sanity on the fact that they wouldn’t last long.
“Come on, let’s get out of here.” I gently extracted myself from Brooke’s hold and unlocked the truck so she and my brother could get in. I stopped with my hand on my door handle to pull out my phone and send Sanjana a quick text.
You mad at me, Sass?
I had barely slid into the driver’s seat when she texted back. Her name lighting up my screen, made it a little easier tobreathe. That was one of the endless things I loved about her. No matter where she was or who she was with, she always made me a priority.
Sassy
Why would I be mad at you, Rye?