Page 27 of Summer Nights

When I didn't answer, he sighed. "Come see the deck."

"You know I've seen all of this, right?"

"Humor me." He held out his hand, and I hesitated for a second before placing mine in his. I never held hands or let a man put his arm around me in public. I kept my distance both physically and emotionally. It was necessary, especially with him. But I was powerless to deny him.

He'd placed comfortable wicker furniture on the deck with blue cushions. But he guided me to the railing where we could hear the waves and smell the salt air.

"This is the dream." This was my dream.

We were quiet for a few seconds, both of us enjoying the view. Gray clouds were moving past, a misting of water hitting the ocean but not us. Not yet. Soon there would be a deluge. A typical summer storm in Florida.

"Why do you feel like you don't deserve this?" Cooper asked softly.

He stood with one hip leaning against the railing, then turned to face me. His hand still held mine, and it was decidedly intimate.

I drew in a breath, not accomplishing anything but breathing him in. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"There has to be a reason why you haven't allowed yourself to have this yet. What is it?"

"The condo's enough for me." I pressed my lips together.

"Is it because you grew up in a trailer? You don't feel like you deserve something better? Are you worried your mom would be upset?"

"Why would she care?" I was fairly positive she didn't know where I lived now. She'd mentioned something about one less mouth to feed when I'd moved out.

"If it's not your mother, then it's you."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't psychoanalyze me."

"I didn't mean to. I just want to understand you. I want to know you."

I shook my head. "Trust me. You don't."

I never thought about why I hadn't bought a home yet. Every time a house came on the market, I knew someone who'd love it. "I liked this one."

Cooper had been looking over the water. His head whipped back. "You liked this house. Mine?"

"And you bought it." I shrugged.

"Why didn't you buy it for yourself?" His voice was careful, measured.

"It was perfect for you," I said simply.

"But what about what you want?"

"My business is about my clients, and this had everything you wanted. What kind of a realtor would I be if I bought your perfect house for me?"

"I can't believe that you didn't say anything. I wouldn't have been upset. I would have been happy for you."

"Maybe I wasn't ready. Maybe you're looking for something that isn't there. There's no big reason. I just haven't felt like doing what I need to do to buy a place." I'd saved more than enough for the down payment. But I was scared to spend it.

"You want to see my bathroom? I haven't done the guest bathroom yet."

"Yeah, I'd love to." Cooper had incredible taste. I was excited to see what he did with the space.

He opened the slider, and I stepped past him. "I remember it had a lot of white tile."

Cooper grimaced. "That bathroom was stuck in the late nineties. The first thing I did was rip it out."