Page 45 of Love, Will

Chapter 11

“Like a dull actor now,

I have forgot my part, and I am out,

Even to a full disgrace.” - Coriolanus

King James` succession on the throne brought a wave of new hope all across London. He was a theatre man and wanted to erase many of Queen Elizabeth’s rules, so one of the first things he did when arriving at court was to pardon some of her prisoners.

This meant that after almost two years of being locked away, Henry was set free. The reverie of the new king’s arrival signified not only my love’s freedom, but my recognition as a playwright and our theatre company being taken under the patronage of James himself. From then onwards we would be called The King’s Men and received scarlet garments to differentiate us aesthetically from the rest of the actors and London folk.

While Henry was locked away, I made the decision to completely give up acting. There was no more joy in it and the new theatre allowed me to write in the stalls above while the men rehearsed. I could not perform any longer, disguise myself to be a different person each day, be that a king or a squire. I did not have enough joy left in my heart to entertain others on stage. So I decided to leave this job to my betters and only focus on creating new parts for them to shine in.

I spent my days either above, watching them rehearse and sometimes get a new idea for a play or in my room, writing vigorously and working on whatever idea I had during the day. Most of my thoughts were haunted by Henry’s imprisonment, so the only good result of his absence wasTroilus and Cressida.

“My love,

I am so content that you are once again a free man, I cannot begin to describe how guilty I felt for not being close to you that day, for not trying to do something to stop your trial and punishment. I begged the guards to allow me to send you a letter, but they only accepted the books. I missed you so much; you are the only light in my bleak life and I could not be happier to know you are now released and well.

Please, I need to see you soon; I need to kiss your lips once more.

Love,

Will”

“My dearest Earl,

I have prayed endlessly for your release and at last; you regained the freedom you so much deserve. I was joyous to hear the news of your release. I am most hopeful you will have a speedy recovery and will be able to join the court once more.

I hope we will see more of each other now that The King’s Men will hopefully entertain at court more often and I am hopeful to see your Earlship again, in the near future.

With dedication,

Will”

The next time I saw Henry was at court while the Spanish delegation visited the King for negotiations and had to be entertained, so naturally, the King’s Men were summoned to perform along with the noble folk who smiled and conversed with the Spanish lords. As soon as we arrived and stepped into the great ceremony hall, my heart stopped a beat and immediately recognized him by those substantial curls and the shine of the hair I had caressed hundreds of times before.

We were presented to the King and bowed, made our reverences and were released to go and arrange the stage for our act, but I could only sit in the corner, watching him move and chat with other lords.

His face looked radiant but some fine lines made shelter on his face due to all the trouble and suffering he had to endure. His expression felt graver than before. Even when he laughed, he did so with certain sorrow. For a moment, he looked towards the part of the room with the stage and spotted me in the crowd, deep green eyes stopping on me for a few seconds, then continued to talk animatedly with other gentry.

I waited and waited, hoping he would find the time to approach me, as he used to do when he was younger and unmarried, to steal away kisses behind a curtain or let our hands accidentally caress while passing one another in the crowd, but to my bitterness, he entirely disregarded my presence and continued to walk through the crowd along with his wife.

I could not resist the urge any longer and, even though I knew I should not do it, even though I was breaking the etiquette and could lose my head any second, especially while doing so in the same room as the King, I could not stop myself from walking to the Earl and asking for a private audience.

I stopped in front of him and bowed, low and slow, taking my time and allowing him to notice me, denying him the chance to walk away from a scene in which I was honouring him.

I raised my eyes to meet his gaze, empty, slightly annoyed.

“Earl,” I greeted and nodded.

“Shakespeare.” He nodded back. “Is there a specific reason you came to me?” he said curtly.

I felt pain piercing through my chest; Henry was completely void of any emotion towards my old self.

“I wanted to ask if the Earl may join me in the garden for a short audience,” I said, almost trembling.

“I do not think…”